I'm new here, and I have a 9 year old step-son. He is the only child. His father and I have been friends our entire lives, and 4 almost 5 years ago we decided to take it farther, At that time we had Xander one week a month, due to the distance between us, and the fact that we had a one bedroom apartment. So when Xander came down he wanted to sleep with dad and I and he was 5 at the time. But we had talked and thought that it would be better to have him sleep in the living room on a pull out. Which lasted like 2 months and I found a 4 bedroom house, which is where we are now, But ever since I moved in and he was no longer allowed to sleep with dad. He has resented me, yells at me for things. Then 6 months later, I here a knock at the door and go and open it and there stands my step-son with 3 small trash bags full of clothes and crying. His mother no where to be found. I asked him what was wrong, and he told me that he was going to live here from now on, and that his mommy made him take all his toys and give them to the kids down the street. So I rushed him into the house and we have had him every since, His mother had only seen him 4 times from the time she dropped him off and talked to him on the phone maybe a handful of times, sadly she passed away this past august " right after school started" He still talks about her as if she is still here. Is there anything I can say or do to try and have a relationship with him? He don't like me, Never has. He has always held me to blame for anything that has ever gone wrong. He has blamed me for his mothers death, He has blamed me for his mom and dad never being together, I would love to have a relationship with him. and try and make some peace in our family home. With out being yelled at all the time or being tattled on for things that I havent done. Any advice?