We have his daughter every other week. Well yesterday she came back to us, and since the moment she walked in the door she's been asking to hold him every 10 minutes (and I usually let her) and follows me around everywhere! I can't shake the shadow.
She is a sweet girl. Just turned 12. And obviously loves being a big sister.
I have 2 issues here.
1. Sd doesn't have any friends, her best friend is her mom and dad. Her dad loves it. Wants to be more of a friend then a parent. And now that baby is here she is always around! She has turned into a mom. If he fuses she's right there in my bubble holding his hand. If I do anything there she is! She practically sits on my to pet him when she isn't holding him. I have a hard time with this because while I love her, I never bonded with her and I have never liked her in my space. I'm nice to her and give her her own space and want mine back. Baby also doesn't need 2 moms. I am his mom. She is a sibling that wont back off or have anything else to do to keep her busy. She tries to tell me how to do things abdominal to be careful and this and that and I know this as I am an adult. I just feel like such a mean person because I wish she would just go away or stay out of my area. But I can't get over it.. couldn't before, really can't now.
#2. My husband, her dad. My mom is here helping and since my sd came back to us every time my mom goes to give my husband the baby he hands him off to my sd. He works all day and hasn't had hardly and time to bondd with baby and now he just gives him off to make his first baby smile. He's always been like that, will do anything to make her smile. I got over it before but now he is not binding with our baby and it is really making me mad. It makes me so mad that I then take the baby back after a bit and go into our bedroom. He says I'm deciding who holds the baby and when and I don't have the right to do that. He's right really but I've been very possessive as this is my first baby. I'm irritated because my sd wants are still coming before mine, his and now our baby . He doesn't understand my side or agree. I have no idea what to do. I love my husband and I love my baby and I feel most terrible that I love our week when sd isn't here as we dont fight then again we are very happy with each other.