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Cancer? What and when to tell bio dd and sk's* update*

Posted by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 3:53 PM
  • 12 Replies
Monday i went to the doctors to see if i could just get a script for being anxious all the time. I have always been this way but now in just tired of fighting it. Doctor did a physical and found that i have a nodule on my thyroid and half of it was swollen up. Got a slew of blood work done and a thyroid ultra sound and tomorrow i find out the results. I have a sinking feeling its going to be cancer,it runs in my family and i have had cervical cancer already and a non cancerous lump removed from my breast a couple of years ago. I have told my bio a lil about whats going on,its hard to hide since she lives with us and wants to know why i have had a lot of doc appts in just one week. Im not sure as to when or if i should tell sk's. They dont live with us. The oldest will be 20 soon and graduating from prototype school in july,so i dont want to ruin that for her,she has worked to hard for any attention to get taken away from that. The youngest who is 16 and lives out of state,im not sure she would even care that much.We have a decent relationship,its civil but far from strong. Not to mention my dh ex has border line personality disorder and when i had a scare with my breast she magically had females problems 2 days later. I really do not want to have to deal with bm calling and trying to one up me. I know how that sounds but she has done it a lot in the past,and to be honest i dont think my dh would be able to handle any drama that may start. Right now im just at a loss and my dh will not talk about the possibility of it being cancer. I tried talking to my mom but she breaks down in tears every time. We lost my dad to cancer,her mom,her aunt and she helped me through my cervical cancer. I do not want to put my mom through any more than she has been through. So here i am trying to cope and stay sane by myself. **** update**** Just got back from doctors. All blood works looks good. White blood cell count is 11.9 and i have to take vitamin d3 however they did find 2 nodules on the left side of my thyroid. I go in for a biopsy Monday afternoon. Doc said it looked like and talks like cancer she just wants to be sure,so now another round of the waiting game begins.My husband lost it in the office,my mother and sister are freaking out but they did say they would be there no matter what. Lucky for me my sister is a nurse and is helping understand on my level what every thing means and what to expect,she even said she would move her if i needed her so my mother wont have to take on the burden,again,of caring for me.
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 3:53 PM
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Replies (1-10):
JacyB
by Bronze Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 4:02 PM
I would wait til you have a plan of action for whatever the issue ends up being and then have your husband call and say something along the lines of "sm has xxx and will be starting treatment in may/June/whenever. I wanted to give you a heads up as this will obviously be affecting out daily lives and any plans we have had. Please keep her in your thoughts/prayers etc"
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ejsmom4604
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 4:07 PM

Deep breath. I know the waiting part is the hardest, not knowing, and your mind running a thousand different directions. I would wait until you get some sort of results in. Once you know, then you can move to the notification part. It's hard not going into detail with a child that lives with you. I held off telling my ODS about my breast cancer until I knew the biopsy results. 

I really hope it comes back benign. 


LittleMama2012
by Silver Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 4:13 PM
I hope it all comes back OK. In the meantime, I wouldn't tell anyone anything. Decide on your plan of action once you get the results. Should it be cancer, I would let Dh tell his children.
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singlemom416
by Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 4:13 PM

Thank you ladies. The waiting is killing me. Doctor put me ambien so i could get some rest and thats not working. I still toss and turn and wake up in the middle of the night. I guess im just really worried because my dd lost her father 8 years ago to a drug overdose and im freaking out over the thought i my child having to possibly bury her mother to at a young age.

Sondi7
by Sondra on Apr. 4, 2013 at 4:15 PM
Quoting JacyB:

I would wait til you have a plan of action for whatever the issue ends up being and then have your husband call and say something along the lines of "sm has xxx and will be starting treatment in may/June/whenever. I wanted to give you a heads up as this will obviously be affecting out daily lives and any plans we have had. Please keep her in your thoughts/prayers etc"



I agree.

Prayers to you and yours!
amonkeymom
by Amy on Apr. 4, 2013 at 4:27 PM

This is good advice.  

fingers crossed

Quoting JacyB:

I would wait til you have a plan of action for whatever the issue ends up being and then have your husband call and say something along the lines of "sm has xxx and will be starting treatment in may/June/whenever. I wanted to give you a heads up as this will obviously be affecting out daily lives and any plans we have had. Please keep her in your thoughts/prayers etc"


bottomline
by Silver Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 4:30 PM

 Waiting for results is excruciating. I am sending prayers and positive energy your way that your results are benign.  I wouldn't say a thing until you know for sure what you are dealing with. Having more people's anxiety isn't going to help you out.  Let DH tell his kids when that time comes, you will have enough to deal with if it turns out to be cancer.  {{HUGS}}

Polkadotted
by Gold Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 4:40 PM

I would hold off until the results come back.  Take a breath and don't freak out yet, wait and absorb what they tell you tomorrow.  I think there were some people on this board (I can't remember for sure if it was here) that have had that form, but there are other possibilities so don't freak yet. 

I'm a need to know type of person and like things to stay private.  If it were me, I wouldn't do any announcing until I absolutely needed to.

Annawest
by Bronze Member on Apr. 4, 2013 at 7:08 PM

I had thyroid cancer 5 years ago.  Cancer is scary and I also just *knew* that it was cancer before ever getting truly diagnosed.  For me, my diagnosis of cancer didn't come until after I had a total thyroidectomy.

If you just got the ultrasound, I would expect you will get a biopsy of the thyroid next.

I wouldn't necessarily tell the SK anything right away.  Your daughter that lives with you is a different story.

When I had my thyroid cancer this is how it went:

Lots of labs

Ultrasound of thyroid-showed the right side of my thyroid was growing it's own blood supply

FNA (A biopsy)- came back as "Adifferential cells similar to papillary cancer secondary to Hashimoto's thyroiditis (I had at this point never been diagnosed as hypothyroid)

So, the biopsy showed that my thyroid cells were similar to that of cancer.  My options were for another biopsy to confirm or to just take the thyroid out.  I chose to take the thyroid out.

After that I had radioactive iodine treatment.  The radioactive iodine was the worst part. 

I've now been cancer free for 5 years.


I didn't tell anyone besides my immediate family about the surgery/CA possibility until after the surgery.  If you have anymore questions please feel free to PM me.

Mommyof5247
by on Apr. 4, 2013 at 7:35 PM
I agree with this.
And I know it's easier said than done, but try not too think so far ahead & negatively. If you worried about not being around for your DD before you even know the results, she's going to worry more & be fearful unnecessarily (hopefully).
Hugs!


Quoting JacyB:

I would wait til you have a plan of action for whatever the issue ends up being and then have your husband call and say something along the lines of "sm has xxx and will be starting treatment in may/June/whenever. I wanted to give you a heads up as this will obviously be affecting out daily lives and any plans we have had. Please keep her in your thoughts/prayers etc"
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