So SS's were down last week for their Spring Break. Since late summer last year they have developed a close friendship with a boy down here and heusually spends the night when SS's come down. SS's are 13 and 11 and this boy is 15. He is very polite, quiet, and well mannered. Honestly I wouldn't mind having here everyday because he is a very good kid.
Well he is also a part of a blended family. He has a 14 yr old step-brother. The 14 yr old wasn't spending the night at first because up until Feb. of this year he was in a institution for bi-polar. Back in Feb. we were celebrating OSS bday and we had both boys spend the night. Other than the 14 yr old being clingy to my attention I didn't really notice anything.
This past week we had both boys over again. I had been sick for two days prior but wanted them to still come over because SS's were really looking forward to it. When they got to our house I told them all the food/drinks they could help themselves to that I was going to let them just hang out and I would be in my room. We have an XBOX in the living room and the boys room so I figured they would be occupying both rooms. Plus I wasn't feeling good so I just wanted to chill out. They got to our house at 6 and by 7:30 the 14 yr old had knocked on my door 5 times wanting to know what I was doing, ask a question, etc. He asked to get on our family computer to log onto his Facebook and I told him no since we don't really do the Facebook thing with the kids and I didn't know if it was ok with his mom. The other 3 boys pretty much played in their room and the 14 yo kept hanging out in the living room. I would ask why he wasn't playing with the others and he said they were playing a game he didn't like. So I told my SS's to try playing a game he wanted too. They would but then the 14 yo would end up back in the living room.
Fast forward to the next morning and we were all at the table eating breakfast. I don't know what the kids were talking about but the 14 yo said rape and I gave him the sternest look ever and mouthed the word no to him. He mouthed ok. Then a few minutes later they were talking and the word tea-bagging comes out of his mouth. I said "dude you have to watch what comes out of your mouth" he said "sorry, am I being good?" The rest of the day he made two comments about me being in my room a lot but I was thinking you are not here to hang out with me. Most teenagers don't want their parents (step) to hang out with them and their friends. He also asked two more times if he could get on Facebook. After the 3rd time I firmly said "I already told you two other times no" He again said "sorry, am I being good?" And he barely interacted with the other 3 boys the whole day.
I feel bad for this boy because he has no friends and he never gets to spend the night with anyone. But honestly I am not comfortable with him here. He has a history of just wandering off at his house even though he hasn't done it at our house yet. I feel like it is a big responsibility for me to have but I feel obligated to allow him to come over since his step-brother comes over.
I haven't talked to his mom yet about what he said. I don't know if I even should. This stinks because I want this kid to have friends but I am honestlyuncomfortable in my own house when he is here.