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Adopting my SS

Posted by on Apr. 8, 2013 at 6:08 PM
  • 2 Replies
I'm in the process of adopting my SS and I'm so fustrated because the lawyers are going so slow and some the negative feed back from some of my family and friends when they found out.

Me and my Dh have been together for 3 years at that time BM was barely in SS life called maybe 1 every 2 months and after me and my dh were married a week later my SS went to see his BM he was 5 at the time. Usually it's only for one week but I begged my dh for a month because SS seemed excited and plus I was trying to consider BM feelings I thought she would want more time than 1 week out of a year even though she really didn't. Well when he came back he hated me told me he wished I would die told me she said he shouldn't like me because I hated him. This was not the same sweet baby that left he loved me we had a great relationship. She went off on me while she had him and I told her I thought I was pregnant in one of the conversations so she told my SS to hate my baby and it would not be his bro or sis. So when me and dh finally did get preg he hated it and when my daughter was born he hated her wanted to kill her I was so afraid to leave her alone for 5 sec to even go to the bath room. I confronted her she thought it was funny and said well hes no longer my responsibility he's yours. she did not call or text him until his birthday that next year by them he had found out everything she said had been a lie cause I treated his the same even when he would tell me he hates me I'd say we'll I love you. When she called him he refused to talk to her so she text my DH and told him to tell SS happy birthday and he's no longer her son that was over a year ago. My DH brought up the option of adoption so I agreed I have been doing for my SS even before me and dh were married shes had not done noting she is not involved period. So I do not understand how I could be wrong for Doing the adoption!
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by on Apr. 8, 2013 at 6:08 PM
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by Ruby Member on Apr. 8, 2013 at 8:51 PM
Who is making you feel wrong and why?

What is the hold up with the lawyer? Are they having to terminate BMs rights first?
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by on Apr. 9, 2013 at 5:59 PM

I feel your pain! I'm in the process of adopting my ss as well. Dh is adopting my dd at the same time... My family tells us we're wrong for what we're doing. How are we wrong?! The kids have asked for this to happen! 

I've been in ss's life since he was three (I missed two years because of an ex, abuse, and medical issues). Ss has no one else. Bm abused him and has no rights, other than cs which she refuses to pay!

Dh has been in dd's life since she was two, she's five now. Her bf was court ordered out of the picture as well. His only way of telling anyone "I have a daughter out there" is by paying cs. He refuses! 

Idk how dd's bf and ss's bm can afford to live! Neither are on pa. Neither will get a job because dser has their ssn's flagged and as soon as they get jobs they take cs out, before they even get their first checks! Up to 90% of their checks are gone before they get them. 

Even though neither have any rights to the kids, they're both fighting the adoptions! They can't see them, get any info on them, nothing, they refuse to pay cs... Bm owes $18k and bf owes $3.5-$4k... I don't understand. Letting dh and I adopt the two kids will stop cs and will no longer incur debt! They would be able to get their licenses back... Neither has custody (of any kind) of their other kids either!!!!

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