she has 4. they are between 2 months and 5 years. all different dad's. dh is the legal father of her oldest, bio of her second, and she popped out one right before me and dh got together and just had another one that is 2 months old.
well, long story short, she's been couch jumping, the only reason dh and i haven't taken her to court for ss is, in our state, the mom has to be on the streets or on drugs before even temp custody can be removed.........it's HARD. well, she recently volunteered primary custody up. she sent ss to live with us (gave us days to prepare). 2 of her other kids are with her sister, and one is with her. She left with the baby, but i guess dad and family threw a big enough legal fit that bm took the baby back and is staying there again (but they are still not "together") Well, her "xmil" for lack of better term has been watching ss. bm is unemployed, we can't afford day care on him, so we asked bm to help out since she doesn't do anything anyways. well, what she MEANT is her "xmil" could watch him because SHE is sleeping all day, etc. they told dh before that he can just drop ss off at the house without walking him to the door. bs! (apparently they don't lock the door at night). Well, i told dh, for ss that's a bad idea cause WE don't know if anyone is awake if we just let him walk in...yeah we passed that up.
so here is what happened yesterday (the reason for the post). anything that is needed outside the home (dealing with finding babysitter, getting legal papers, talking to bm) i let him handle. He takes ss to babysitter, and picks him up, etc. the mil came out, and asked dh to talk to him for a second (so he does). in short, she asks him his side of what happened to him and bm. without going into detail (not knowing if this could come up to bite me or dh) he tells her things that she replies with "that sounds all too familiar, and she does that here too".
then not to mention. i'm bout ready to give bm a piece of my mind. dh said she has been hitting on him left and right (knowing he's married-which obviously doesn't mean a thing to her). what i mean by that is she "play hits him" gives him looks, etc which yeah i can see her doing, because (seeing as she has 4 different dad's) she jumps from one disco stick to the next.
not to mention AFTER (not that i would've been ok with this) but after dh gets home with ss-she was asleep when he picked her up. she texts him "can you come back and take me to the er?" he told her "no i did that for 3 years, i'm not doing it again and needs wouldn't be too happy with that. if your problem is that bad-call 911"
i'm ready to get on facebook and message her (only access) telling her i understand they need to keep in contact for ss's sake, but that's it. leave my husband alone! dh told me if she does it again, go for it.
or hell *I* will start taking ss and picking him up. remove him from the scene all together (so bm can't get him "alone")