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Co-parenting

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 13 Replies

any SMs here have there DH and BM of SKs co-parenting even though they do not live together. If so how is it working out ?

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 19, 2013 at 2:02 PM
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pepper504
by Gold Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 2:45 PM

I have 50/50 with my ex and DD16 is being raised as if we are still together.  They key is making sure that you and the OP have similar values in how you want to raise your child[ren].  My ex and I had a very similar upbringing and that helps tremendously.  He is more harder on DD16 than I am, but the main key is be on the same page for the major things and compromise when need be.

yryssa1
by on Apr. 19, 2013 at 2:47 PM
I would be interested in hearing about this too. My ex and I co-parent great by my DH and BM, not so much
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pdxmum
by Platinum Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 3:29 PM
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I'm a BM who coparents quite well with BF.  plus, I get along with SM.

pdxmum
by Platinum Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 3:30 PM

Why did this need to be anon?  Simple question, no heat, no drama, no bear poking.

pepper504
by Gold Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 3:38 PM


Quoting pdxmum:

I'm a BM who coparents quite well with BF.  plus, I get along with SM.

I got along with SM as well.  She's now exSM and after her dragging my DD16 into their bullshit divorce, I kinda now have nothing to do with her.  Although she made it quite easy by unfriending and blocking me on FB. 

I introduced myself to his new GF/babymommadrama but she isn't too friendly and seems a bit insecure with my presence.  My sister made it a point to tell me that she noticed that and I told her "I thought that it was just me."  As I can be intimidating at times (which I've been told a few times), but I'm only 5'1 and 98 freaking pounds.  Not sure what is so intimidating, but . . .

I've kept the door open and we shall see how GF/babymommadrama is. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 19, 2013 at 3:46 PM

Habit i guess 


Quoting pdxmum:

Why did this need to be anon?  Simple question, no heat, no drama, no bear poking.


 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 19, 2013 at 3:52 PM

SS12 lives with us and SS11 lives with BM. we do EOW and ae it so that he boys are there together and here together on weekends. DH and BM do not get along at all and do not raise the kids at all the same. She complains she would like to co-parent but she intentionally does the polar oppisite of what DH says/does and then flips out that he does not respect her and wont co-parent with her. I wish they could make it work but i dont see it happening 


Quoting pepper504:

I have 50/50 with my ex and DD16 is being raised as if we are still together.  They key is making sure that you and the OP have similar values in how you want to raise your child[ren].  My ex and I had a very similar upbringing and that helps tremendously.  He is more harder on DD16 than I am, but the main key is be on the same page for the major things and compromise when need be.


 

pepper504
by Gold Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 3:55 PM

Yeah, that is an impossible thing to do.  It's set up to fail.  My DH and BM cannot coparent because BM is just a lunatic who lives in a different reality from normal people.  DH sees who ex and I parent DD16 and how we work well together and *thought* that he could do the same with regards to his child.  Lets say epic fail on that. 

Quoting Anonymous:

SS12 lives with us and SS11 lives with BM. we do EOW and ae it so that he boys are there together and here together on weekends. DH and BM do not get along at all and do not raise the kids at all the same. She complains she would like to co-parent but she intentionally does the polar oppisite of what DH says/does and then flips out that he does not respect her and wont co-parent with her. I wish they could make it work but i dont see it happening 


Quoting pepper504:

I have 50/50 with my ex and DD16 is being raised as if we are still together.  They key is making sure that you and the OP have similar values in how you want to raise your child[ren].  My ex and I had a very similar upbringing and that helps tremendously.  He is more harder on DD16 than I am, but the main key is be on the same page for the major things and compromise when need be.




leegirl_jm
by Platinum Member on Apr. 19, 2013 at 4:27 PM
1 mom liked this

DH and BM co-parent, it is easy to do because they have very similar parenting values, education if very important to them both, so is discipline and DH is very passionate about sports so he is very supportive of SS's ECs.

kss12
by on Apr. 19, 2013 at 4:30 PM
Ss's BM is the same way. She says they need to communicate then all the sudden she does something outlandish and crazy. Recently they have as I am now the communicator. If we need to switch the days I ask her for dh or we ask dh's mom to communicate with her.
It's hard sometimes. Depending on bm's mood depends on how everything goes that day. Good luck :)


Quoting Anonymous:

SS12 lives with us and SS11 lives with BM. we do EOW and ae it so that he boys are there together and here together on weekends. DH and BM do not get along at all and do not raise the kids at all the same. She complains she would like to co-parent but she intentionally does the polar oppisite of what DH says/does and then flips out that he does not respect her and wont co-parent with her. I wish they could make it work but i dont see it happening 




Quoting pepper504:


I have 50/50 with my ex and DD16 is being raised as if we are still together.  They key is making sure that you and the OP have similar values in how you want to raise your child[ren].  My ex and I had a very similar upbringing and that helps tremendously.  He is more harder on DD16 than I am, but the main key is be on the same page for the major things and compromise when need be.




 


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