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swearing at the age of 3!

Posted by on Apr. 20, 2013 at 4:19 PM
  • 27 Replies
Hi everyone,I think im posting in the right place. Basically me and my partner have his daughter every weekend and well here is my problem. today we were down the park and SD starting kicking off & she shouted at my partner ''Get here now or im going to F**king kill you''. We were both shocked & fuming my partner told her off and told her shes not to ever say that again. He also asked where she had learnt that from and she said her mum. Thankfully there were no other kids in the park. Now we fully understand that SD has no idea what she said was bad because shes only a kid. But she is 3 years old and the last thing i want is for her to be saying that kind of thing in school around other kids or in genral. Neither of us have ever said anything like that before so either BM has said it or someone involved with her has. And its disgustig to think that BM would say stuff like that. It angers me. My parter will be having words with BM tomorrow but no doubt she will blame us or just not say anything like she always does. How do we stop it from happening again?. Because I don't want my SD shouting foul mouth like that again. Not to mention it would make us look like bad people if SD say's it again infront of people. Please help!
by on Apr. 20, 2013 at 4:19 PM
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Replies (1-10):
momma2dnm
by Member on Apr. 20, 2013 at 4:44 PM
Each and every time just state we don't use those words. Then ignore. My nephews cuss worse than any adult I have ever met. When they say them I tell them we don't use those words and go on. Because they don't get a reaction out of me by the end of the day we are cuss free. Now how to stop her from never saying them idk. I think just be consistent and she will eventually grasp they are wrong and will stop using them. As much as a person trys they will never be able to fix the other household so show her on your time
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CodeBlue
by on Apr. 20, 2013 at 4:45 PM
a few weeks ago sd4 was sitting in the kitchen while her dad and I were talking. her dad said "son of a " and didn't finish his phrase. he didn't have to. sd4 yelled BITCH!

Honestly? I went to my room and laughed because she said it in the perfect tone. it WAS inappropriate, and no, she definitely didn't learn that word from us. likely, she did hear it from BM but how can you know for sure? maybe she heard it at daycare, or on Tv.


Is it worth it to start a blame game/drama with BM? Probably not. in my situation, her dad told her she was not to say that word, she started crying Bc she thought she was in trouble, and he picked her up and sat and talked to her. She didn't say it or anything like it the rest of her time with us (2.5 weeks). Effective parenting on your husbands part is key. you cant make her mom stop swearing (if it was indeed her), you can only control how you deal with it at your home.
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Tryshx
by on Apr. 20, 2013 at 4:58 PM
BM cursed directly at SS not just around him so he used curse words quite frequently... We just told him that those were grown up words and he had to live a few more years before earning the right to use them.
CKuse
by on Apr. 20, 2013 at 5:21 PM
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Eh, maybe I'm one of the few parents that doesn't mind cussing. If my daughter cusses oh well I'm just going to try to teach her where it is and isn't appropriate
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Tinkerbellmama
by Platinum Member on Apr. 20, 2013 at 5:39 PM

I swear more often than most people, never at the kids (SD or 3 bios), but I do swear. We've had issues here and there with the kids repeating things. But, DH and I have always just told them that those aren't appropriate words for a child to use. The kids willl often tell me that when I swear it teaches them it's OK, LOL

Most often now, DD5 will say something is kickass.  We laugh, and remind her it's not really the most appropriate thing for a 5 year old to say. DH and I aren't really all that horrified by it, they're just words, however, she can get into trouble at school for saying those things, so we encourage her to find other words.

The bigger deal you make it out to be, the bigger reaction you give this kid, the more often she's going to use those words. 

DDDaysh
by on Apr. 20, 2013 at 5:59 PM

lol...  there are WAY bigger fish to fry

I knew that word when I was 3 and people laughed when I used it.  I learned pretty quickly it wasn't acceptable to use in certain places though, and for a long time I cussed less than most other kids my age because I was conscious of words and when the appropriate times to use them were.  

My son knows alot of words.  He also knows when not to say them.  Time to teach her.  

whatIknownow
by Ruby Member on Apr. 20, 2013 at 6:23 PM
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or maybe she heard it on TV.

she's three. this is normal child behavior, to be dealt with by normal parenting.

Do you have any children?

Leigh84
by Silver Member on Apr. 20, 2013 at 6:28 PM
I know how you feel when my YSS was 2 he said "I shit in your mouth" omg it was awful BM proudly admited he heard it from her. Apparently her and SF were fighting over the bathroom and that's what she told him she would do to him if he didn't get out
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Polkadotted
by Gold Member on Apr. 20, 2013 at 7:00 PM
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We aren't as self censored as most either.  All the kids hear it, they use it once in a while, but for the most part it fades. We also use the it's adult word lines.  And that they aren't allowed to use them at people or in school or public.

Quoting CKuse:

Eh, maybe I'm one of the few parents that doesn't mind cussing. If my daughter cusses oh well I'm just going to try to teach her where it is and isn't appropriate


chanizen
by Platinum Member on Apr. 20, 2013 at 7:25 PM
That's me too. I taught dd that some people get offended by certain words and you shouldn't use them when you know that.

One time we were at a restaurant And they were starting a poetry slam. Well, they were very worried about her hearing swears. As in, slightly obnoxiously worried.

We tried to get her to offer a haiku;

My mother told me
Real poetry wouldn't have swears
She doesn't know shit

A would have died. Dh too. Sd almost fell out of her chair. Dd too. But she wouldn't do it.....

I don't care about swears. It's the offending people who you care about that is the problem. Or people in public areas...


Quoting CKuse:

Eh, maybe I'm one of the few parents that doesn't mind cussing. If my daughter cusses oh well I'm just going to try to teach her where it is and isn't appropriate

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