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House Rules

Posted by on Apr. 21, 2013 at 10:36 AM
  • 32 Replies

BM states the house rules at our house are "too strict" and doesn't lend to a kid being a kid.  I have looked over my house rules many times and can't see to figure out how they are too strict.  My question to all of you, are what are your house rules?

I have a 7 year old DS

SS is 6 year olds.

by on Apr. 21, 2013 at 10:36 AM
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chanizen
by Platinum Member on Apr. 21, 2013 at 10:40 AM
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Well. House rules have to be right for everyone involved. I took a strong stand 6 years ago and wish I hadn't.

While it wasn't WRONG or malicious, it caused tension which could have been avoided.

Maybe lighten up a bit if it is making ss uncomfortable and ask dh to pitch in if it results in more work for you.

Ease in. Be mindful of the children's needs and wants as well. Because, well, ideally you WANT them to be thrilled to be there and be part of it. Not resenting having to do the windows or resenting and acting up towards you because you are changing things too quickly, ya know?
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thatislife
by on Apr. 21, 2013 at 10:44 AM
1 mom liked this

Which rules that are 'too strict' is she referring to?

Annawest
by Bronze Member on Apr. 21, 2013 at 10:45 AM

Well, I didn't add at the top that our house rules were made by the 4 of us.  I had some that were non negotiable, DH had some that were non negotiable and then the boys wanted to add some.  We asked for their input and then made a sign that hangs in the kitchen.


MommySabs
by Gold Member on Apr. 21, 2013 at 10:46 AM
What does she feel is too strict?
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rebeccasmly
by on Apr. 21, 2013 at 10:48 AM
Our house rules are as stands: you respect yourself, others, and the house we live in. But my kids are quite older except my youngest who is 6.

When they were younger, basic rules. No hitting, no running inside, no yelling inside, etc.
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Annawest
by Bronze Member on Apr. 21, 2013 at 10:54 AM
2 moms liked this



Quoting MommySabs:

What does she feel is too strict?

She states she wants him to follow all the rules we have and that is how she wants him to behave and in the same breath says we are too strict.  Here are our house rules.

  • No hitting or pushing

  • No kicking

  • No spitting

  • No yelling

  • No name calling

  • No arguing

  • Always tell the truth

  • No running in the house

  • If it's not yours ask before you use it

  • Do not go outside without asking for permission

  • Do not answer the door or phone without permission

  • Pick up after yourself

  • Use your manners

  • Listen when being spoken to

  • Treat others with respect


The red ones are things that CAN get immediate consequences.  The arguing is with adults, I expect the boys to argue with one another.  The yelling, is yelling, not kids just being loud while playing. It's yelling when angry etc.

The yellows are things that you shouldn't do and if you do them enough and after warnings that you'll eventually have consequence.

The green are more just reminders.  The boys added all the yellows and greens to the list.

whatIknownow
by Ruby Member on Apr. 21, 2013 at 10:55 AM

as the ladies said above, what specifically is too strict? I can't have an opinion until I know what the rule is.

ETA: ah i see you posted them. Well, I think she may have been referring to something specific. I don't know. I'd have to ask her what she means.

In any case, I'd suggest you let your  husband deal with her. It's really not your problem.

chanizen
by Platinum Member on Apr. 21, 2013 at 11:07 AM
I can't read the yellow...


Quoting Annawest:




Quoting MommySabs:

What does she feel is too strict?

She states she wants him to follow all the rules we have and that is how she wants him to behave and in the same breath says we are too strict.  Here are our house rules.


  • No
    hitting or pushing


  • No
    kicking


  • No
    spitting


  • No
    yelling


  • No
    name calling


  • No
    arguing


  • Always
    tell the truth


  • No
    running in the house


  • If
    it's not yours ask before you use it


  • Do
    not go outside without asking for permission


  • Do
    not answer the door or phone without permission


  • Pick
    up after yourself


  • Use
    your manners


  • Listen
    when being spoken to


  • Treat
    others with respect






The red ones are things that CAN get immediate consequences.  The arguing is with adults, I expect the boys to argue with one another.  The yelling, is yelling, not kids just being loud while playing. It's yelling when angry etc.

The yellows are things that you shouldn't do and if you do them enough and after warnings that you'll eventually have consequence.

The green are more just reminders.  The boys added all the yellows and greens to the list.


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Annawest
by Bronze Member on Apr. 21, 2013 at 11:07 AM



Quoting whatIknownow:

as the ladies said above, what specifically is too strict? I can't have an opinion until I know what the rule is.

ETA: ah i see you posted them. Well, I think she may have been referring to something specific. I don't know. I'd have to ask her what she means.

In any case, I'd suggest you let your  husband deal with her. It's really not your problem.

You are exactly right, it's not my problem, but I do care about her opinion.  Her son is in this house half of the time and while I may not agree with her opinion, I do respect it.  I wanted some other opinions on whether they felt these rules were too strict for a 6 and 7 year old because I do not see it.



chanizen
by Platinum Member on Apr. 21, 2013 at 11:10 AM
Have you asked her which rule specifically she objects to? I would....
And is it the rules, the punishments or the enforcer she objects to?


Quoting Annawest:




Quoting MommySabs:

What does she feel is too strict?

She states she wants him to follow all the rules we have and that is how she wants him to behave and in the same breath says we are too strict.  Here are our house rules.


  • No
    hitting or pushing


  • No
    kicking


  • No
    spitting


  • No
    yelling


  • No
    name calling


  • No
    arguing


  • Always
    tell the truth


  • No
    running in the house


  • If
    it's not yours ask before you use it


  • Do
    not go outside without asking for permission


  • Do
    not answer the door or phone without permission


  • Pick
    up after yourself


  • Use
    your manners


  • Listen
    when being spoken to


  • Treat
    others with respect






The red ones are things that CAN get immediate consequences.  The arguing is with adults, I expect the boys to argue with one another.  The yelling, is yelling, not kids just being loud while playing. It's yelling when angry etc.

The yellows are things that you shouldn't do and if you do them enough and after warnings that you'll eventually have consequence.

The green are more just reminders.  The boys added all the yellows and greens to the list.


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