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Who's going to jail??? UPDATE!!!

Posted by on Apr. 22, 2013 at 10:15 PM
  • 67 Replies
1 mom liked this

Ok, some of you might remember my old SN, SuniVonDea. I posted a lot about the court battle for DH to get visitation and how difficult BM was being. At one point she was actually found in contempt for denying visitation. But the sentence (3 whopping days in jail) was placed on hold pending future visitations. We assumed that meant that if she denied again, a warrant would be issued for her arrest. Right?

Anyways, we now live 3 hours from her (we moved) and are still responsible for all transportation. Which isn't an issue. Last visitation BM let DH keep SS for an extra 3 days so we didn't have to make 3 trips up there in a 7 day period. (We would have made the third trip if we'd had to.) Which was great of her. 

Tonight, she texted asking if we could pick him up Thursday when he gets out of school instead of our normal pick up time, Friday at 6 pm. DH said, no can do. Not purposely to be an asshole, there are legitimate reasons we can't make it until Friday. And even that is a stretch. Wednesday DH is going under the knife for a minor procedure, but he will still be out of commission for a couple of days. That's cool tho, I could still make it work. But we honestly have under a half tank of gas and $6 to our names until Friday. We just cant afford to do it a day early. There's no one we can borrow from at the moment. 

She originally texted saying she needs us to get him because she has to work and has no sitter. (This is the millionth time she's had or tried to have DH take him because she doesn't have a sitter. I think its time to find adequate child care.) But moments into the conversation she claims to have a sitter, but the sitter doesn't want to "deal with" DH picking up his son. DH says "not my problem." BM also claimed she moved AGAIN and refused to give DH her new address. 

She's flipping out now saying she's going down to FOC tomorrow to file something saying DH is refusing visitation. (How she can file saying he refused days before the visit is to occur, is beyond me.) And threatening him with jail time. Which doesn't seem plausible. 

If we show up to her last known address on Friday at 6 and SS is not there, ready to go, we will be making the trip on Monday to file contempt for denying visitation. 

I see she is trying to flip the situation to make it seem like DH is in the wrong. Maybe I'm biased because he's my husband. (lol) But really, who's in the wrong here?




******************************************************************************************************************

BM just texted DH. "I guess ill see you firday" 

I wanted so bad for him to reply with "that's right, fall back hoe" (just because she says that shit to him ALL THE TIME and it would have been hilarious. But inappropriate. 

So since she'd stated earlier that she moved.. she just admitted it was a lie. *eyeroll*

by on Apr. 22, 2013 at 10:15 PM
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Replies (1-10):
PumpkinSpice8
by Silver Member on Apr. 22, 2013 at 10:34 PM
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BM is in the wrong.
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leanntx
by on Apr. 22, 2013 at 10:37 PM
2 moms liked this
She's wrong. Your DH is doing what he is supposed to do.
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mouthyhousewife
by Silver Member on Apr. 22, 2013 at 11:22 PM


I do feel bad that we can't help her out when she was very generous helping us last time. 

Quoting leanntx:

She's wrong. Your DH is doing what he is supposed to do.



Tinkerbellmama
by Platinum Member on Apr. 22, 2013 at 11:48 PM
1 mom liked this

Technically, he's denying EXTRA time, not his actual visit. If the CO says Friday at 6pm, then in the eyes of th law, his visitation doesn't start until Friday at 6pm, unless both parties agree to a different day/time. Same as his visitation ends at 6pm on Sunday, if he still has SS after that time, he's technically broken the law unless both parties have agreed to a different day/time.

I say your DH is right. Good luck with all of that drama. I do not envy you. 

packermomof2
by on Apr. 22, 2013 at 11:52 PM
1 mom liked this

I find it hilarious that you complain about her withholding visits and then go on to say she needs to find adequate child care when she is offering dad extra time.

But I have an odd sense of humor and see humor in situations that others may not.

mouthyhousewife
by Silver Member on Apr. 23, 2013 at 3:20 AM
It's not like she's offering him more time to be nice. She just wants a free babysitter. She calls everyone and their brother before "offering" the time to DH. But the thing is, tho DH would LOVE to have his son more, sometimes it doesn't work out. Just like she has certain times where she's not available to be there (like when she's working) DH can't just drop everything at a moments notice to be her built in babysitter. She's used up all of her friends and most of DH's family. They don't want to babysit for free every time she's got to work. When DH and I are both working outside the home, we have to find adequate childcare. And pay for it. Just like most people do. If she found one person who could do it all the time she wouldn't be so stressed about finding a sitter every time she's scheduled to work. It's about being prepared. She's got SS going to someone else's house everyday. Missing school. She even had her brand new bf babysit him. The guy turned out to be a junkie. She's just looking to get something for nothing.


Quoting packermomof2:

I find it hilarious that you complain about her withholding visits and then go on to say she needs to find adequate child care when she is offering dad extra time.


But I have an odd sense of humor and see humor in situations that others may not.


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AMBG825
by on Apr. 23, 2013 at 6:22 AM

 BM is wrong. Just because she makes a change to the agreement doesn't mean he has to agree to the change.

 

And it doesn't matter if the sitter wants to deal with p/u's or not. There's a court order in place.

 

And ....(but wait there's more) if BM moved and didn't notify the courts ...even if it were down the street ...she can get in trouble.

amantonacci
by Gold Member on Apr. 23, 2013 at 6:24 AM

does he help with child care?

whatIknownow
by Ruby Member on Apr. 23, 2013 at 6:55 AM

It sounds like threatening court and filing contempt is the first thing the two of them do when they can't agree.

If I were you, I'd focus primarily on changing that. 

twinklebites
by Bronze Member on Apr. 23, 2013 at 7:56 AM

 I kinda agree with Packer here If I don't have child care because I have to work the weekend I think my kids should go to BF. I shouldn't have to pay someone else if BF is available she couldn't possibly know funds are short for you this week, have you asked her to maybe help contribute to gas for this time ? I would if BF asked, There has got to be a compromise she needs BF to help and he wants more time right? Maybe its time to start an  "yay last minute gas fund so I can get extra time with my kids!!

 "


Quoting packermomof2:

I find it hilarious that you complain about her withholding visits and then go on to say she needs to find adequate child care when she is offering dad extra time.

But I have an odd sense of humor and see humor in situations that others may not.


 

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