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Visitation didn't happen

Posted by on Apr. 26, 2013 at 11:48 PM
  • 20 Replies
DH made such a huge deal out of not being able to make it to get SS on Thursday (a day early). So we were planning on leaving town today at 3pm. Went to take DD to school this morning... My transmission blew. I'm irate right now. It's going to cost $1500 to fix. That's more than what my van is even worth at this point. So needless to say, we had to tell BM we couldn't take SS and hopefully next visit we will have another vehicle or find one to borrow. BM's mom called me to tell me how sick SS was and that his asthma had been acting up. I told her we weren't going to make it. She was nice about it. But BM was working. So she texted DH when she got out and he told her. She flipped. Saying he was lying and refusing to take his visitation. So she's again, threatening to go to FOC tomorrow and file a "refusal" or whatever. Says to DH "hope you like sitting in jail" SMH. I hope she gets a new bf soon... :p
by on Apr. 26, 2013 at 11:48 PM
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Replies (1-10):
kristinbugg
by on Apr. 26, 2013 at 11:55 PM
2 moms liked this

She's not wrong.  BD did refuse to take his visitation.

I think BOTH of them are childish and immature.  Neither BM NOR BD sound like they should be raising this innocent child.  BOTH of them, as parents, need to get their acts together, stop baiting each other and realize that they have a child that they need to work TOGETHER to raise.

Will DH post this conversation on the internet also?

Mrs_Nelson
by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 12:01 AM
1 mom liked this
If they have no transport how are they too get the child for visitation? She is wrong. He is not refusing visitation, he is unable to take visitation due to extenuating circumstances. Anyone with any sense will understand.


Quoting kristinbugg:

She's not wrong.  BD did refuse to take his visitation.


I think BOTH of them are childish and immature.  Neither BM NOR BD sound like they should be raising this innocent child.  BOTH of them, as parents, need to get their acts together, stop baiting each other and realize that they have a child that they need to work TOGETHER to raise.


Will DH post this conversation on the internet also?


teenmom0305
by Member on Apr. 27, 2013 at 12:04 AM

BUMP!

momof2ex1
by Ruby Member on Apr. 27, 2013 at 12:33 AM
1 mom liked this
Don't let her threats scAre you. Or irritate you. I was told the other day that visitation is not an obligation on the NCPs part. It's only an obligation that the CP make the child available. If he consistently cancels over and over and over again with no real reason, then she could ask to have his time lowered. But... It has taken me since last July to document weekly cancellations of Thursday night visits for me to be able to file to exclude Thursdays from the custody order. The ONLY reason I am doing this is bc my ex has cancelled every single Thursday since last July. It has become a burden on my household and my after school care for him to cancel every single Thursday at the very last minute. He knows on Wednesday that he is out of town and won't be back on Thursday to pick up.. So my petition is very valid. Missing one weekend due to car trouble is nothing. She's just trying to get you bent out of shape. I am extremely happy when my ex cancels. More time for me. BUT my problem is it's become extreme and it's conflicting with my household schedule. One or two or even five times wouldn't cause me any bother.
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mouthyhousewife
by Silver Member on Apr. 27, 2013 at 3:48 AM
That's pretty much exactly my thoughts on the matter. It's a rare circumstance anyways. If she does drag him back to court, she'll only make herself look like fool. But the court thing, it's just idle threats. She still threatens to get him locked up for child support. And he just paid all his arrears in full a few months ago. So she has nothing to hold over his head.


Quoting momof2ex1:

Don't let her threats scAre you. Or irritate you. I was told the other day that visitation is not an obligation on the NCPs part. It's only an obligation that the CP make the child available. If he consistently cancels over and over and over again with no real reason, then she could ask to have his time lowered. But... It has taken me since last July to document weekly cancellations of Thursday night visits for me to be able to file to exclude Thursdays from the custody order. The ONLY reason I am doing this is bc my ex has cancelled every single Thursday since last July. It has become a burden on my household and my after school care for him to cancel every single Thursday at the very last minute. He knows on Wednesday that he is out of town and won't be back on Thursday to pick up.. So my petition is very valid. Missing one weekend due to car trouble is nothing. She's just trying to get you bent out of shape. I am extremely happy when my ex cancels. More time for me. BUT my problem is it's become extreme and it's conflicting with my household schedule. One or two or even five times wouldn't cause me any bother.

WifeyC
by Platinum Member on Apr. 27, 2013 at 7:14 AM

Is it different in the state you are in?  Here you can't file against NCP for not taking visitation.  

Your DH and her are in the middle of a pissing match.  They both need to get over it.

whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Apr. 27, 2013 at 7:51 AM


Same here, visitation is always optional for the NCP and you can't make them take it. If they miss too much of their visitation on a regular basis, the most you can do is file a motion to modify, and reduce their visitation per CO. I think she is bringing up jail because you mentioned in another post that she would have to go to jail if she continued to deny him his visitation. So now, " ha ha your'e going to jail" seems to be the tomatoes they are throwing at each other.

I think your DH should give some thought to burying the hatchet and improving his relationship with his child's mother. How long are the two of them going to continue like this? This is no way to live, and it's no way to raise a child together.

Quoting WifeyC:

Is it different in the state you are in?  Here you can't file against NCP for not taking visitation.  

Your DH and her are in the middle of a pissing match.  They both need to get over it.



BioNerd
by on Apr. 27, 2013 at 8:07 AM

 This

Quoting WifeyC:

Is it different in the state you are in?  Here you can't file against NCP for not taking visitation.  

Your DH and her are in the middle of a pissing match.  They both need to get over it.

 

Quinn525
by Bronze Member on Apr. 27, 2013 at 8:16 AM
Foc will laugh on her face if she files for missing a visitation. They only get upset if you deny visitation. When we brought up that bm didn't take her parenting time for 3 months, they didn't care because she had taken all her time for the following month.
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mouthyhousewife
by Silver Member on Apr. 27, 2013 at 9:45 AM
As far as I know, there's nothing she can file. She doesn't have much knowledge of the family court system, despite what she thinks.
As far as the pissing war, you're right. It's a constant battle and its not all bm's fault. DH feeds into it and at times is guilty if initiating it. But he gets the same response out of BM whether he is nice, or even non responsive.


Quoting WifeyC:

Is it different in the state you are in?  Here you can't file against NCP for not taking visitation.  

Your DH and her are in the middle of a pissing match.  They both need to get over it.


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