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No Chores, No Responsibilities for Teen Stepdaughters

Posted by on Jun. 13, 2013 at 9:25 PM
  • 10 Replies

I'm at my wits end because my husband will not ask his teen girls to help out wit the household chores.  They have become lazy and he will not say anything to them.  His ex said he could not handle the older one and we got custody of her and two years later, the next one came,  ex still claiming she could not handle them.  My house is dirty and I cannot even say anything because I'm the bitch who complains about everything. Has anyone ever had this problem?

by on Jun. 13, 2013 at 9:25 PM
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Replies (1-10):
spicy0425
by Silver Member on Jun. 13, 2013 at 9:52 PM
1 mom liked this

Stop doing the chores. Take a vacation for yourself. Disengage. 

DDDaysh
by on Jun. 13, 2013 at 10:21 PM
1 mom liked this
Assign your husband the chores you think his girls should be doing. Maybe if he needs to do them he'll start thinking they should. And if he refuses to do them, then clearly he isn't very respectful of you in your relationship. Maybe it's time to move out and let him see what life is like without a maid?
MommySabs
by Gold Member on Jun. 13, 2013 at 10:36 PM
1 mom liked this
My best friend is in a similar situation I will tell you what I told her- learn the word no and stop letting your dg walk all over you. For you (and her). It is a dg problem. He needs to either step up and help out or make his kids do their fair share.
tiredmama42
by Silver Member on Jun. 14, 2013 at 7:06 AM
2 moms liked this

We had the same situation.   SD wouldnt even clean her own room let alone help with anything.  You would have thought we were running a flop house.  DH had never had a arguement until she was there and havent had one since she has been gone.  The kid grew up living in a dump with her BM.   I spend all my time cleaning and it just pissed me off that a girl of that age couldnt help do a damn thing.   These kids are not going to know how to do anything when they are ready to move out.     The last month she was with us she wasnt even allowed to "ask" to do anything if her room & bathroom wasnt picked up.   

whatIknownow
by Ruby Member on Jun. 14, 2013 at 7:09 AM
3 moms liked this

Hire a house cleaning service, present DH witht he bill.

DDDaysh
by on Jun. 14, 2013 at 10:52 AM

 DG?  As in "Dog"?  ;-)

Quoting MommySabs:

My best friend is in a similar situation I will tell you what I told her- learn the word no and stop letting your dg walk all over you. For you (and her). It is a dg problem. He needs to either step up and help out or make his kids do their fair share.

 

MommySabs
by Gold Member on Jun. 14, 2013 at 10:56 AM
Lol haha in those cases yep but really just autocorrect has gone mad.


Quoting DDDaysh:

 DG?  As in "Dog"?  ;-)


Quoting MommySabs:

My best friend is in a similar situation I will tell you what I told her- learn the word no and stop letting your dg walk all over you. For you (and her). It is a dg problem. He needs to either step up and help out or make his kids do their fair share.

 


MommySabs
by Gold Member on Jun. 14, 2013 at 10:56 AM
Lol haha in those cases yep but really just autocorrect has gone mad.


Quoting DDDaysh:

 DG?  As in "Dog"?  ;-)


Quoting MommySabs:

My best friend is in a similar situation I will tell you what I told her- learn the word no and stop letting your dg walk all over you. For you (and her). It is a dg problem. He needs to either step up and help out or make his kids do their fair share.

 


Birdseed
by Platinum Member on Jun. 15, 2013 at 3:40 PM
1 mom liked this

I think you have a few options.

If DH really doesn't want the girls to have any chores/responsibilities, that's his right but I think it really does not do much for teaching kids life skills that they'll need later.  Does he want them to be the dorm mate who gets kicked out?  <shrugs>

I'd let him know that he can take care of their messes or hire a cleaning service but SM is not the family cleaning service.

I think that most kids are quite capable and really don't mind helping out cleaning up IF everyone is doing it together.  For us, cleaning day is Saturday morning.  We get our chores done before we do anything fun.  Has to be done by noon or we stay home...

But really, it's a DH thing.  If he isn't interested in teaching his kids how to clean up after themselves and help out in the communal home they live in...well you have a problem.  You really can't unilaterally put anything into effect. 

jlg12678
by Gold Member on Jun. 15, 2013 at 4:59 PM
1 mom liked this

I personally wouldn't do jack for them at this point. Leave all their mess for your dh to deal with. If he doesn't want them to help out he can do everything for them on his own. 

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