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Stepkids and vacations

Posted by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 12:20 PM
  • 38 Replies

My husband and I have been married eight years. I can't have children. My husband has two kids from previous marriage. Son 12 and daughter 14. They live full time with their mom. We get them every other weekend. I  am a step child myself and due to how I was treated by my SM, I have tried very hard to not treat these children that way. 

In the eight years of our marriage, we have taken three vacations without the kids. Two out of the country (mom wouldn't let them go and one trip to disney for our first anniversary). On all other vacations, they have been family vacations. Their mom doesn't take them on vacations so if they  the kids get to go anywhere it is up to us to take them.

For our 10th anniversary my husband wants the two of us to go back to disney. I have mixed emotions. I want us to go without the kids, but then other part of me feels guilty for not including them. Any suggestions?

by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 12:20 PM
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Replies (1-10):
packermomof2
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 12:32 PM
1 mom liked this

His choice, I guess.  

I don't vacation without my kids, period.  I never saw a point in it.  It's up to the parent if they want to involve their children in their vacations.

leegirl_jm
by Ruby Member on Jun. 22, 2013 at 12:39 PM
9 moms liked this

You can celebrate your 10th anniversary as a couple, no kids included, there is nothing wrong with having a couple only vacation.

Wife, Mother and Career Woman living in Jamaica

sandeeyo
by Le Bonjour Chat on Jun. 22, 2013 at 12:43 PM

Go without the kids.

Abbydo12
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 12:44 PM

My parents always took me on vacations too. My husband on the other hand didn't grow up like I did.

mommytoeandb
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 12:45 PM
We have 2 kids and take kid-free trips. ;)
Abbydo12
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 12:46 PM

Do you feel guilty not taking them?


Sondi7
by Sondra on Jun. 22, 2013 at 12:49 PM
2 moms liked this

Can you guys compromise and do something more low key for your anniversary (like a weekend getaway or something) and then do the Disney trip with the kids at a different time? 

You guys deserve to take an anniversary trip together without the kids and without guilt.

Abbydo12
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 12:52 PM
1 mom liked this

I suppose we could. Maybe that is something we could do.

sandeeyo
by Le Bonjour Chat on Jun. 22, 2013 at 12:55 PM
1 mom liked this

My parents didn't always take us with them.  But they were never really gone for too long.  And they DID take us on vacations, although it was a big deal for us to actually go somewhere.

DH takes his kids to see his parents every year at the end of the summer with detours to the nearest amusement park on the way.  But we take vacations by ourselves each year too.  For some reason, the culture these days is to take kids on European vacations, Hawaiian vacations and such.  It's nice for the kids to go somewhere, but it isn't necessary for them to go EVERYWHERE...especially because kids are just expensive when it comes to vacations.

We never feel guilty taking a trip just me and DH.  DH's kids are spoiled in otherways.  Believe me, he more than makes up for the lack of fancy vacations for his kids.


Quoting Abbydo12:

My parents always took me on vacations too. My husband on the other hand didn't grow up like I did.



Abbydo12
by on Jun. 22, 2013 at 1:02 PM

My husband makes up for it too. He is frustrated with them right now. He doesn't hear from them until it is time til pick them up for their visit or when he calls. When they come over all they want to do is eat everything in the house and think we owe them something. 

My husband feels we will have a better time without the kids. 

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