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After ALL the BS drama from BM...

Posted by on Jun. 23, 2013 at 11:11 PM
  • 5 Replies

http://www.cafemom.com/group/114270/forums/read/18687574/Summer_visitation_special_circumstances 


This is a follow up to the above post. So, ALL sorts of BS drama from BM about summer visitation. She hasn't taken regular visits in 11 months, no regular contact with SD in 11 months, NO contact with SD's providers (therapists, counselor, doctor, specialists, etc) BM has suddenly decided to enforce the CO. Fine, whatever. That also means that she's responsible for getting SD too and from her appointments every week (weekly physical therapy, bi-weekly occupational therapy, weekly group counseling, and weekly counseling).

BM went so far as to threaten DH with contempt of court. Not for trying to adjust the summer schedule, but for the joint decision making non-emergent healthcare. Now, DH has copies of EVERY email he's sent, about 90% of those emails are from BEFORE appointments. The only emails that have been from AFTER appointments have been regular physical and occupational therapies, and after SD's every 3 month eye specialists appointments. If BM can't remember that SD have PT every week, OT every week, and sees her eye specialist every 3 months, that is NOT our problem. And, in BM's most recent email she states that she agrees with, "everything both you and SM have done." So, we're not really sure HOW she plans to file contempt for not following the parenting plan when she's 1. ignored every email DH has sent regarding medical care and 2. Went so far as to say she agrees with everything that we've done.

Anyways, one of the big issues for BM over the last 3 days was SD's urologist appointment on Thursday morning. Well, today when we dropped SD off she said, "Would it be OK if I dropped SD off to you that morning and you guys can just take her to that appointment?" Oh wait! It gets better. DH says, "sure, do you want us to drop her back off to you after the appointment?" And BM says, "No, you guys can just keep her and hang out all day, I can come pick her up that night." 

Then BM says, "Oh, SM, I'll be sending you an email later regarding when I need you to watch SD. I'm not sure if I can get her to her physical therapy appointment Tuesday, and I may need you to watch her after her occupational therapy appointment Wednesday." Well, first, I've made plans for Tuesday afternoon seeing as for the last 3 days BM has been insisting that she's going to everything just fine all on her own. And Wednesday is SD's 13th birthday (which I'd LOVE to have her all day), but BM also made a huge deal of HAVING to have SD that day.

Seriously! I WISH this woman would just make up her damn mind! And I really need to know more in advance if she needs me to babysit SD on her time. I offered, so that's really not an issue, but DS is gone this week with a friend and when BM said she was taking SD all week I decided to make plans to do something fun with my DDs (they're 5 and 6), something that neither SD nor DS would be in to.

by on Jun. 23, 2013 at 11:11 PM
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Replies (1-5):
pdxmum
by Ruby Member on Jun. 23, 2013 at 11:18 PM
1 mom liked this

Lesson here.  Don't offer to babysit on Bms time.

so she has her for a week but needs you to take her Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday?

Tinkerbellmama
by Platinum Member on Jun. 23, 2013 at 11:25 PM

It's REALLY not an issue for me at all. I'd rather have SD with me than some random friend of BM's. Here SD can hang out with her friends, I can make sure she's getting to therapy and doing her exercises and activities. Plus SD is really excited because this means she can hang out with the neighbor boy (whom she has a bit of a crush on, loil).


Quoting pdxmum:

Lesson here.  Don't offer to babysit on Bms time.

so she has her for a week but needs you to take her Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday?



sarawags
by on Jun. 24, 2013 at 1:51 AM

I can't help help but feel like bm is using you here - whatever you start now you'll be clearing the way for doing often in the future - do you really want bm in charge of YOUR schedule? 

Tinkerbellmama
by Platinum Member on Jun. 24, 2013 at 2:29 AM
Honestly, no I don't want her in charge of my schedule. But, if she's too busy to spend her visits with SD, its going to go a LONG way in court to help DH prove that BM's time with SD should be reduced.

That, plus the reccomendation from SD's counselor.

I mean, if she can't get SD to ANY appointments on her time and can barely go 36 hours before I have SD for a full day... That will only further prove our point in court.


Quoting sarawags:

I can't help help but feel like bm is using you here - whatever you start now you'll be clearing the way for doing often in the future - do you really want bm in charge of YOUR schedule? 


bottomline
by Silver Member on Jun. 24, 2013 at 10:18 AM

 Why is bm changing everything SHE threw a fit to get? Is she on drugs or something?

I realize you want't SD to get to therapy but you allow yourself to be bm's "plan b" way too much.

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