My stepson's birth mom has expressed interest in moving to Texas over the past several years. This year she is getting serious about it. Just today she sent my husband an email stating she wants to move to Texas July 31. She would be moving in with her aunt and family (husband and 2 small children). She doesn't have a secure job yet but thinks she can get a temp job or data entry job until she can get her Texas teaching certificate and obtain a teaching position. We all currently live in south Florida and have ever since ss7 was born. Bm is an only child and her parents recently moved to central fl, her fiancé left her leaving her with no support system where we all currently live. Bm was also let go from her teaching position this year and hasn't found a replacement position yet (she isn't looking very hard either). So bm wants to move to Texas to be closer to family. Just a little background info...ss doesn't know this family he has met them a handful of times and was too young to remember even meeting them, this family is also not blood related. The aunt is her mom's step sister.
Our background: we have a very stable family life. We have been married 4 years and will be having our 3rd little girl very soon. So ss has a very loving and involved birth father, 2 sister that adore him as he adores them (3rd sissy on the way which he picked her name), and stay at home step mom. We are finacially well off and treat ss as he is just one of the other kids. He has his own room, clothes, toys, and family nearby.
So again how do you answer her question on moving? We don't want to hold her back but it just doesn't sound like a stable situation. She hasn't proposed a new parenting plan either nor has she even talked about it with ss. Ss is very attached to both his parents so we feel he would be devasted to be taken away from one of them. We also fear this other family will eventually get annoyed with them living in their house.
So far we have offered bm finacial assistance to move closer to us so we could be her support system. Offered for her to move to Texas and establish herself then we will bring ss to live with her. Ss to live with us full time and visit her (until she can get her life back on track).
So what would you do? FYI: her rental lease is up July 31 and she is currently unemployed.