Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Stepmom Central Stepmom Central

Charging DH for kids mess (L&L style)

Posted by   + Show Post

I'm at a loss of how to deal with the skids messes.  I don't ask anything of them (that's a long story - but I just don't) but I DO ask DH to "make sure IT'S taken care of" and he can either ask the skids or do it himself, whatever he likes. I'm not their maid.  So, sometimes he doesn't pay attention or isn't there.  I decided to "charge" DH  in Love & Logic style - you know - "I'm happy to take care of it but I charge hefty fees"  I'm not sure how to make him "pay up" but we have decided on a monthly allowance each of us gets for our own spending money and I can always just reimburse myself the way we have it set up - Anyways - what do you ladies think about this approach to this frustration?  I'm frustrated from feeling resentful and having no one around that cares more than me about their stuff.  At least this makes me care a little less if I'm getting somewhat compensated.  ;)

by on Jul. 7, 2013 at 9:19 PM
Replies (31-31):
NonSMom
by Member on Jul. 9, 2013 at 8:13 PM

It's been hard for DH to "pay attention" to the things you mentioned in your second paragraph.  Sounds great - but maybe he's generally too overwhelmed or trusting to make sure the dishes are all put away before driving the princess to her friend's house.  And I'm left there steaming....so we are on the same page, just he's not paying attention and the kids know it. So, someone should get paid (or docked) if he just won't or can't pay attention, in my hard ass opinion ;)

Quoting JustaSM231:

How old are your skids? How often are they at your house?

I would talk to DH and explain that skids need to clean up after themselves if they are old enough and I agree that at age 3, most kids can help at least pick up their rooms and their toys/things in general living areas.

Show skids what is expected and how to do the chores they are expected to do. Make a chart or list if necessary. If they don't do their part, they loose privileges until its done such as TV, computer, video games, playtime, etc. If DH isn't on board with this plan, let him know what your decision regarding cleaning is: either he does it or you do it and get paid or you hire a maid to do it. But you both need to be on the same page!!


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)