I am re-defining my role in my own head... I want to be "just" Dad's wife. I don't want to "be" stepmom to my sd anymore.
I feel like in my head being defined as stepmom carries with it responsibilities to the child. But by defining myself as just Dad's wife, it is a totally different role in my mind.
The recent decline in my relationship with my sd has brought me to this conclusion. By allowing myself to only consider myself as dad's wife, I feel like I mostly just need to support my husband but not make "raising" or parenting my sd my concern.
I guess to me it just feels like one more step in disengaging from my stepfamily situation.
My sd has become increasingly disrespectful and I feel like the only recourse I have right now is to step back... way back. I have my own son to take care of and worry about. My husband is currently unwilling to address the situation with my sd. Honestly, I am not completely innocent in contributing to the current situation, but I feel like I haven't really "done" anything to make things the way they are. I mean that maybe I could have reacted to a few things differently, but my behavior and attitudes toward my sd haven't really changed. The main problem is I'm not willing to just let my sd's disrespect happen to me. I really feel like sd's bm has had a huge impact on the way things currently are. I also think my dh has allowed things to digress to the current situation.
I feel powerless to really change my sd's behavior, so I feel like the only action I can take right now is to step back and just be a wife to my dh and a mom to my ds.