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how to help my son cope - update reply 11

Posted by on Jul. 28, 2013 at 2:39 PM
  • 16 Replies
So bm is moving out of state next weekend.

I'm going to be honest with you guys and myself, I don't think dh is going to fight too hard to stop the relocation. I also don't see him taking the initiative to see sd more than once every 4 to 6 weeks. I just don't. I see visits tapering off over time and us only seeing her during holidays and fun times.

My son and sd are very very close. More like best friends than siblings.

My son has social delays and sd has been a huge help with getting him to open up. If she is not around he tends to play alone vs play with other kids.

We currently see her every weekend. She goes home tonight and I don't know when we will see her again.

Both kids are upset but being 5 I don't think they fully grasp the distance and how little they will see eachother.

Any tips on how to help my son cope with losing his sister and his best friend ?
by on Jul. 28, 2013 at 2:39 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Polkadotted
by Gold Member on Jul. 28, 2013 at 3:24 PM

Have him draw her pictures and letters to send her. Tell him she is going to live in X town and we'll see her when we can.

Will he be starting school or are you homeschooling?

abigailsmommy11
by Kelli on Jul. 28, 2013 at 3:30 PM

That's about how often we see Sd now. (Bm moved 4 hours away last fall) We used to have her 48 hours every week. It's been a really hard adjustment for all of us but honestly, my Dd has probably adjusted the best. (Sd is 4 and Dd is 2) She would get really upset and ask for Sd a lot, but for the last couple months she's been asking less and less. The move has actually been hardest on Sd, she's confused and upset all the time. She doesn't really get any dicipline at Bm's, so she has a hard time coming to our home and not being able to call the shots. All I can say is try to be really patient and understanding. Good luck!

....ClvrScn.
by Silver Member on Jul. 28, 2013 at 3:42 PM
He starts school in 3 weeks. He is very aprehensive about it


Quoting Polkadotted:

Have him draw her pictures and letters to send her. Tell him she is going to live in X town and we'll see her when we can.

Will he be starting school or are you homeschooling?


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luckystars2012
by Gold Member on Jul. 28, 2013 at 5:22 PM
1 mom liked this
Why isn't your dh going to fight the relocation/
....ClvrScn.
by Silver Member on Jul. 28, 2013 at 5:27 PM
He doesnt like confrontation for one. For two he feels like its a lost cause because he cant afford a lawyer


Quoting luckystars2012:

Why isn't your dh going to fight the relocation/

luckystars2012
by Gold Member on Jul. 28, 2013 at 5:45 PM
1 mom liked this
Wow. How do you feel about that? I'd be pretty disappointed in j if he gave up that easy....


Quoting ....ClvrScn.:

He doesnt like confrontation for one. For two he feels like its a lost cause because he cant afford a lawyer




Quoting luckystars2012:

Why isn't your dh going to fight the relocation/


....ClvrScn.
by Silver Member on Jul. 28, 2013 at 5:55 PM
Both dissapointed and hurt but I have learned that I cant try harder than him. Neither of her parents try hard enough to coparent.


Quoting luckystars2012:

Wow. How do you feel about that? I'd be pretty disappointed in j if he gave up that easy....




Quoting ....ClvrScn.:

He doesnt like confrontation for one. For two he feels like its a lost cause because he cant afford a lawyer






Quoting luckystars2012:

Why isn't your dh going to fight the relocation/



luckystars2012
by Gold Member on Jul. 28, 2013 at 6:00 PM
That's true. You can't do any more than he is willing to do.


Quoting ....ClvrScn.:

Both dissapointed and hurt but I have learned that I cant try harder than him. Neither of her parents try hard enough to coparent.




Quoting luckystars2012:

Wow. How do you feel about that? I'd be pretty disappointed in j if he gave up that easy....






Quoting ....ClvrScn.:

He doesnt like confrontation for one. For two he feels like its a lost cause because he cant afford a lawyer








Quoting luckystars2012:

Why isn't your dh going to fight the relocation/




SMInProgress
by on Jul. 28, 2013 at 6:51 PM

Skype is the only thing I can suggest. My heart really goes out to your son & to SD.  My DD gets along with her step siblings but she's older than they are not as young as your son.  Maybe they can be skype pals & she can read a book to him over the internet while he sees her.  Not just him, you & DH can get in on the action too :)  Good luck!

reesesami
by Member on Jul. 28, 2013 at 9:36 PM
I really don't mean to be rude but how can you respect him as a father? My husband and I would have serious issues if he just gave up on any of our kids like that.


Quoting ....ClvrScn.:

Both dissapointed and hurt but I have learned that I cant try harder than him. Neither of her parents try hard enough to coparent.




Quoting luckystars2012:

Wow. How do you feel about that? I'd be pretty disappointed in j if he gave up that easy....






Quoting ....ClvrScn.:

He doesnt like confrontation for one. For two he feels like its a lost cause because he cant afford a lawyer








Quoting luckystars2012:

Why isn't your dh going to fight the relocation/




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