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Did you go to court to be CP?

Posted by on Aug. 15, 2013 at 12:43 AM
  • 30 Replies
Basically I'm asking are you a mom or stepmom with a DH who had to go to court to become custodial parents? What was your reasoning for getting/pursuing full custody? How long did it take you? If you went to court and lost, why do you think that is?
by on Aug. 15, 2013 at 12:43 AM
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Replies (1-10):
TexasGirl90
by Member on Aug. 15, 2013 at 1:51 AM
Bump
jeniemarie
by Member on Aug. 15, 2013 at 2:10 AM
nope. cps removed SS and gave us full custody
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
TexasGirl90
by Member on Aug. 15, 2013 at 2:30 AM
If you don't mind my asking, why was CPS brought in


Quoting jeniemarie:

nope. cps removed SS and gave us full custody

thejodigirl
by Member on Aug. 15, 2013 at 3:09 AM

Hmm. I'm suprised no one has chimed in to correct you on the "we" custody thing. 


Quoting jeniemarie:

nope. cps removed SS and gave us full custody



TexasGirl90
by Member on Aug. 15, 2013 at 3:24 AM
Usually people jump down your throat for that.. I don't see a problem saying we


Quoting thejodigirl:

Hmm. I'm suprised no one has chimed in to correct you on the "we" custody thing. 



Quoting jeniemarie:

nope. cps removed SS and gave us full custody





LyndaLoo78
by Skeletor on Aug. 15, 2013 at 5:26 AM

I was given sole legal/physical custody in the divorce.  Ex has attempted to obtain joint custody and failed to make his case by proving a change in circumstance to change that.

WifeyC
by Platinum Member on Aug. 15, 2013 at 8:10 AM

DH filed emergency custody after CPS removed all of BM's kids from her home.  It was temporary for 6 months and then made permanent.

Doodle39
by Bronze Member on Aug. 15, 2013 at 9:01 AM
1 mom liked this

My DH has always been the PCP.  Initially it was without a court order.  Then, he filled for a CO and was granted 60/40 PC joint legal.  Over the last 4 years it fluctuated between 60/40 and 80/20.  Recently he was temporarily granted full custody, requiring BM to enter a DA program and giving BM the option for supervised visits.  Currently she hasn't opted to exercise her visitation.  We don't know if she's seeking DA treatment.  DH will go back to court in a couple of months to review the status.  

DH initially sought out custody to protect his involvement in SS life.  He has sought additional custody due to BMs erratic behavior, drug and alcohol use and illegal activity that puts SS in harms way.  

DH initiated his first court activity 41/2 to 5 years ago.  SS is 5 1/2 yrs. old.  

While DH has always been granted primary, there have been lots of perceived losses.  I'd say that there is a desire for the court system to keep families intact and that has contributed to the leeway, that in our opinion has been afforded to BM.  Also, the nature of our concerns needed to play themselves out in ways that were documentable.  Another words, BM not only needed to be struggling with her demons but had to get herself in enough trouble to provide evidence for the courts demonstrating the magnitude of the issues in order for the courts to warrant them severe enough to interfere with her ability to parent.  

SassyMom25
by Gold Member on Aug. 15, 2013 at 9:36 AM
I always have been CP of my ODD7...as my ex chose not to sign the BC or go after any rights. DH adopted ODD in Feb.

DH has always been CP to SS11, though it was made official in 09 when he and BM divorced...they had been separated for almost 5 years.
TexasGirl90
by Member on Aug. 15, 2013 at 10:44 AM
Sorry, whats PAS?
Quoting cmm443:

BM filed for primary in Nov 10.  The court didn't give a court date until the following May.  My DH counterfiled for a variation of joint custody (with DH having SS primarily during the school year and BM having him primarily during the summer).  They had to go to court 3 times throughout the summer due to the opposing cousel being disorganized and dragging out their witness testimonies.  My husband pursued the arrangement because he wanted SS to go to our school district, which is known for having some of the best public schools in our state.  We also have some mild PAS issues, which we thought would get worse if BM got custody.  However, we didn't feel it was in my SS best interest to go from 50/50 to one parent or the other having primary all year.  This was the best option to get him in our school district and give him a little more consistency but giving BM extra time during the summer to make up for some of the time she doesn't get during the school year.  The judge ended up sided with my DH.


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