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Well well well

Posted by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 9:41 AM
  • 14 Replies
So I've been a stepmother for 2 years now and since the beginning we have been at each others throats. Well this past week I finally called bm out and asked her if we all could just start over, what brought this on is my mother in law posted a status about how shitty Bm was because she "left ss at school" and how terrified ss was and blah blah blah I thought it was ridiculous to post all over FB so I called BM, she had no knowledge he was left, she was at work and found out over FB. Turns out SF's sister was supposed to get him Thursday and she though she was supposed to get him Friday, big mix up but shit happens and it was the first time it happened. So I called bm and found out what happened and told her that DH Wasn't upset with her at all and that she was doing a good job and not to listen to mil on Facebook it's all crap. Well she called me back after she got off of work and we started talking and found out. The reason we have been at each others throats for 2 years is because mil has been feeding both of us bullshit to keep us fighting and mil goes back and forth monthly on who's side she is on. So all of our troubles have been stemmed by mil. I knew she was nasty I just didn't know how much.
by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 9:41 AM
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Replies (1-10):
SMInProgress
by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 9:52 AM
1 mom liked this

That's great you can start over with BM! Much luck to that but just be a lil careful with the ring leader MIL as some people automatically replace "the enemy/ frenemy" with another "enemy/ frenemy" in their place. But I think it's great you & BM are both willing to overlook & start fresh. My dd's SM is an angel, it makes it so much easier to co-parent with her.

DeliteCrazy
by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 10:00 AM
Time to disengage from mil.

Deal with her either when you have too or not at all.
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whatIknownow
by Ruby Member on Sep. 2, 2013 at 11:30 AM

It's good  you got to the route of the problem. Now you can pre-empt further misunderstandings, now that you and Mom can speak directly to each other. 

It was awful of MIL to make a FB post, criticizing her grandchild's mother.

amonkeymom
by Amy on Sep. 2, 2013 at 1:29 PM

I'm glad the two of you were able to talk and get on the same side for your stepson's sake if nothing else.  

It sounds like you both need to just start ignoring MIL completely.

iSMILEheCRIES
by Bronze Member on Sep. 2, 2013 at 1:43 PM
2 moms liked this
Sounds like a productive outcome from that little mix up! GL just watch that MIL and BM don't end up on the same side somehow.
spicy0425
by Silver Member on Sep. 2, 2013 at 2:32 PM
1 mom liked this

Good point !! I didnt' think of it that way, but it's one to look out for.


Quoting iSMILEheCRIES:

Sounds like a productive outcome from that little mix up! GL just watch that MIL and BM don't end up on the same side somehow.



charmed_423
by Member on Sep. 2, 2013 at 4:21 PM
Oh I know, trust me I don't plan on becoming "best friends" with either of them but at least now I know to go straight to the source and make sure that's what is going on before DH gets mad for no reason and now knowing means if I have any questions I can go to bm about ss now.


Quoting spicy0425:

Good point !! I didnt' think of it that way, but it's one to look out for.



Quoting iSMILEheCRIES:

Sounds like a productive outcome from that little mix up! GL just watch that MIL and BM don't end up on the same side somehow.





CampClan
by Bronze Member on Sep. 2, 2013 at 5:09 PM

So glad you went over the MIL & straight to the horse's mouth (so to speak)! Now you both know to call each other next time MIL says something to head off her lies. And hopefully your DH can nip this thing in the rear right now & get his mom in line!

ZennMomma
by Bronze Member on Sep. 3, 2013 at 1:08 PM

Oh that's shit.

im sorry.

i hope you and BM can get along now, that is such a great gift for the kid/kids involved.

charmed_423
by Member on Sep. 3, 2013 at 1:39 PM
1 mom liked this
Isn't it though, my DDs father and sm have a wonderful relationship with us and it makes it so much easier. I feel comfortable calling sm and just talking to her, there is no fear of being "screwed over" no sneak attacks we are just very open and honest about it. I want that for us with ss and his bm and sd. I want to have a good comfortable relationship it would just be so much easier.


Quoting ZennMomma:

Oh that's shit.

im sorry.

i hope you and BM can get along now, that is such a great gift for the kid/kids involved.


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