DH had to work all weekend so I was home alone with SS - 2 years old. I am 8 months pregnant with our first. BM was supposed to take SS this weekend but never contacted DH - which is often the case, we weren't surprised.
SS was a terror. Mostly just being a 2 year old, not listening, throwing tantrums, and going a mile a minute all the time. Saturday morning I was trying to make some breakfast and he was climbing all over my feet, and I couldn't even eat in peace because he wanted what I had - though he had already had breakfast - and he wanted it from my bowl not his own.
For the first time in over 2 years, I found myself resentful of BM. I love my SS. I have since day one. He is an amazing little boy and I am so blessed to be a part of his life. But I was resentful of her. Thinking she was probably sitting at home, enjoying her breakfast in peace and quite. Maybe she would get to take a Saturday afternoon nap, read a book, or just not have to trip over toys all day. Maybe she would be able to go to the grocery store without a 2 year old in tow.
I feel wrong for feeling this way. And even though SS probably had no idea I felt this way, I apologized over and over to him on Sunday. I still feel guilty. Like I ruined our weekend by feeling this way. This little boy has already lost out on having his BM around and now he has me, the evil SM.
Has anyone else ever experienced anything like this? I told DH and he understands and he was around yesterday so I had help. Like I said, I've never felt this way before. I feel so bad.