My SS, age 25, and I have not had a good relationship for the past three years. The problems started when with SS when he got engaged. Issues SS had with DH from his childhood came out; words were said; SS decided the had to blame someone for all the problems of his childhood and teen years and in his words, "I couldn't blame dad so I chose you (me SM)" and thus the problems have gotten worse and worse. He has found ways to hurt me and say cruel things over time to the point that my DH and I have sought marriage therapy to deal with this problem since my DH will not support me or stand up for me against his son no matter what his son does.
So here is the clincher: DH has slowly been rebuilding his relationship with SS (they have had lunch together recently and are going to a ballgame this month) So, yesterday, DH comes to me and says, "Why can't you just fake it around SS? Just pretend to like him and have a good time around him. I want you to be as close to him as you are with SD (she and are good friends) one day. You don't have to buy him gifts like you do her, but......"
So, SMs, do you think I should just fake it? SS has yet to make any amends with me, and I don't trust him to not hurt me again. Is faking it a good idea? My friends think DH is being selfish to expect me to make all the consessions while he makes none. I am beaten down by this whole situation.