I will try and make this short. SD9 has started "abusing" BM. SD9 has decided that getting up early for school isn't on her agenda, so when the alarm goes off, she stays in bed. If BM comes in, trys to wake her, she yells, throws stuff at her, or hits/tries to hit her if she is close enough. BM does nothing, except call DH, who then goes over and disciplines SD9, its better for a few days, repeat whole thing. This happens after school as well, BM has taken to letting SD go to bed whenever, wherever, b/c she strikes out, etc. When it happens in the afternoons, DH is at work, so BM calls ME to come deal with SD!! Up til now, I have not gone, feeling it isn't something I need to participate in. No matter what is said, BM is still trying to make this my problem. We collectively, are at a loss as what to do. BM refuses to get SD counseling, while DH thinks SD might do better here. BM thinks so too, BUT refuses to try it unless the CO and CS stay the same. DH isn't concerned about the CS, but wants the CO to change if SD moves here as BM has pulled crap in the past.
Part of the reason BM wants SD to come here is a convo BM had with SD. BM had asked SD if she has ever tried to hit me, and SD said NO, not in a million yrs. SD happened to be here the one and only time DD had ever hit me, and I handed MY child her behind. SD told BM that's why she wouldn't hit me, b/c "(my name) means business or else." I would never do to SD what I did to DD, b/c she's SD NOT DD. We are just not sure what to do, b/c BM refuses to have some guts, but comes to us with the issue!