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I grew up with Step Siblings but I never considered them "Step", they are my brothers. My husbands ex wife tells my two step sons (her children) that their half brother is not, nor never will be their brother. She verbally attacks my 1 year old son through text messages and emails. I've never treated her badly and I've always said I will never take her spot, she will ALWAYS be their Mom and I've made it clear that I'm not on her side and I'm not on my husbands side...I'm on the boys side. Yet she still continues to tell them to act like they don't see us when we are at school function and my 1, almost 2 year old doesn't understand why his brothers wont come see him. She have those boys so scared that they are afraid to come to our house. The first day is us showing them that things their Mom has told them are not 100% sure, 2nd day they are amazing. Running around, playing, cuddling, etc. then the 3rd day comes and they watch the clock like crazy because they know they will be going back to Mommy's house soon. How do handle the drama and hurt she is causing her own children and our family? Will she ever act civil towards us? How can a Mother verbally attack another child? I can't wait and I get so excited when the boys are coming for their weekends at our house but I hate the hurt that comes along with them.
by on Sep. 30, 2013 at 7:28 PM
Replies (71-80):
OvertiredMommy
by Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 4:57 PM
The skids zeem to be really good kids, so i cant see bm being a bad mom, and she doesnt say why bm is constantly texting really bad things about the baby. The disrespect is that regardless of rather bm likes the idea that bd had another child, she has no right to harrass sm or text anything about the baby

Quoting Pero3:

I'm still confused about the "disrespect" you mention .... so far, the OP has failed to disclose the exact nature of what she considers "harassment". 


So, for the sake of further information ... what exactly is BM doing wrong here?



Quoting OvertiredMommy:

This got off main topic, in this post the skids are not doing anything wrong, its bm. I made a comment to do harrassment and someone quoted something i said about a whole nother topic. But that was the disrespect i was replying to what she said to me

OvertiredMommy
by Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 4:58 PM
Im sorry, my phone changed some of my s"s to z

Quoting OvertiredMommy:

The skids zeem to be really good kids, so i cant see bm being a bad mom, and she doesnt say why bm is constantly texting really bad things about the baby. The disrespect is that regardless of rather bm likes the idea that bd had another child, she has no right to harrass sm or text anything about the baby



Quoting Pero3:

I'm still confused about the "disrespect" you mention .... so far, the OP has failed to disclose the exact nature of what she considers "harassment". 



So, for the sake of further information ... what exactly is BM doing wrong here?





Quoting OvertiredMommy:

This got off main topic, in this post the skids are not doing anything wrong, its bm. I made a comment to do harrassment and someone quoted something i said about a whole nother topic. But that was the disrespect i was replying to what she said to me

Pero3
by Silver Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 4:58 PM

Unless you know something we don't ... or I missed something ... what are these "bad" things about the baby? 


Quoting OvertiredMommy:

The skids zeem to be really good kids, so i cant see bm being a bad mom, and she doesnt say why bm is constantly texting really bad things about the baby. The disrespect is that regardless of rather bm likes the idea that bd had another child, she has no right to harrass sm or text anything about the baby


 

CFSTBSM27
by Bronze Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 5:19 PM
? Ok lol
Im sorry you don't like the fact people might find it hard to believe how you can analyze the emotional capacity of toddlers dealing with adult emotions. Guess i'm negative lol. I actually didn't even mention or begin to delve on your concerns but I can tell your just one of those people who only want to hear what they like. Too bad

Quoting CLarson1987:All I see when comments like this it just shows your most likely a negative person. Instead of looking at the situations you could maybe give some advise on, you choose to pick one that you obviously don't know how it honestly feels when someone says your 1 year old doesn't deserve to be here.

Sorry you wasted your time replying.


Quoting CFSTBSM27:Seriously....How exactly do children so small comprehend all of that? Im a little confused seems a but over the top

whatIknownow
by Ruby Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 5:23 PM


not only did she not say what the bad things were, there was also no indication that the Mom texted or harassed the OP.

Quoting Pero3:

Unless you know something we don't ... or I missed something ... what are these "bad" things about the baby? 


Quoting OvertiredMommy:

The skids zeem to be really good kids, so i cant see bm being a bad mom, and she doesnt say why bm is constantly texting really bad things about the baby. The disrespect is that regardless of rather bm likes the idea that bd had another child, she has no right to harrass sm or text anything about the baby





Tillymommie
by Silver Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 6:09 PM


Quoting CLarson1987:

I grew up with Step Siblings but I never considered them "Step", they are my brothers. My husbands ex wife tells my two step sons (her children) that their half brother is not, nor never will be their brother.This does suck, but you can just say well he is your half brother and leave it at that.
She verbally attacks my 1 year old son through text messages and emails.What does she say? Bm texts Dh all the time and says, his and my other children (Ds, who is Dh's SS, and DD, SS's half sib) aren't her concern. They aren't. I don't consider them to be. Nor is her "SD" any of DH's concern, which he has had to remind her as well. I ignore anything negative from BM now. It makes things less stressful for me.
I've never treated her badly and I've always said I will never take her spot, she will ALWAYS be their Mom and I've made it clear that I'm not on her side and I'm not on my husbands side...I'm on the boys side.Don't worry about interacting with her. I only do when necessary, which is sadly more then I care.
Yet she still continues to tell them to act like they don't see us when we are at school function and my 1, almost 2 year old doesn't understand why his brothers wont come see him.Having a 1 year old, I can see this being sucky. My DD loves her brothers and when they play soccer, I have to hog tie her to keep her from running on the field after them. When they come off the field, she attacks them with hugs and kisses. You just have to say bubbies are busy and calm him the best you can.
She have those boys so scared that they are afraid to come to our house. The first day is us showing them that things their Mom has told them are not 100% sure, 2nd day they are amazing. Running around, playing, cuddling, etc. then the 3rd day comes and they watch the clock like crazy because they know they will be going back to Mommy's house soon What is she telling them? I don't allow running in my house, MIL does. The first hour we are there, the boys are angels, Dh and I leave, we come back, they are running like crazy. It could be just adjusting on their part.
. How do handle the drama and hurt she is causing her own children and our family?You (DH) only acknowledge texts, emails, converstation from her that pertains to the kids (not your DS) health, school, general well being and visitation.
Will she ever act civil towards us?Wouldn't even worry about this. Just let your DH kill her with kindness. You ignore her.
How can a Mother verbally attack another child?Some people don't like kids that aren't their own? Again, what is she saying TO your toddler? Does she call him names to his face? Threaten to beat him? I don't like my DH's god daughter. (I am nice to her) but she aggravates the hell out of me. She is spoiled and rude and doesn't listen to her parents at all, Well she is better these days, but I always dreaded her coming to my house. Oh but I won't babysit her.
I can't wait and I get so excited when the boys are coming for their weekends at our house but I hate the hurt that comes along with them.What are they saying/ doing that is hurtful? 


malinda74
by Bronze Member on Oct. 1, 2013 at 7:18 PM
1 mom liked this
I'm gonna go in a different direction here.....um I could almost be the BM. I never said horrible things about the ow's baby. I don't know how long your DH and x have been divorced But my x had an affair with OW resulting in baby born prior to our divorce being final. I was hurt...sad...devastated at MY children's loss and guess what? Angry hurt people lash out. Its sorta normal. I told my DS that dads new baby was NOT his sister. I'm embarassed to admit this now.
I'm also not implying that you are the OW...just my personal situation. I'm just saying maybe she is still grieving and acting out of that place of hurt. Not condoning the behavior but maybe consider that this might not be all about you and your feelings.
NDNQT
by on Oct. 2, 2013 at 8:24 AM
Went through a similar situation. Bm has no contact with me whatsoever. All contact is through dh. Time has somewhat helped. I know it has helped my sanity! I focus on all of our children when we have them all. We have a yours, mine & ours family. All you can do is sit down with the children (if they are old enough to understand) and express your love and appreciation for them in your family. But mostly, show that love in everything you do with them. My skids are 11 & 8. They have actually stood up for our family to their bm. Do not however try to play bm against dh and how she/he are filling the children's heads with lies. This just confuses the children and causes more problems. Just love them and enjoy your time with your family. And about the clock watching justremind them they will come back in however many days until their next stay. Best of luck!
grits71
by Member on Oct. 2, 2013 at 5:05 PM

 

Quoting whatIknownow:

I think it's the ghetto version of whack-a-mole.

Quoting sandeeyo:

Isn't slapahoe like a game or something?

 

Quoting whatIknownow:

 

The harassment charges will be dropped due to, it's not actually harassment. And slapahoe will land you in jail with the other criminals.

Quoting OvertiredMommy:

I see whackjobs have told ya not to read them, but I would either file harrassment charges or go slapahoe on her

 

 

 

 

 

 

 I almost peed my pants!

destinyangl21
by Bronze Member on Oct. 2, 2013 at 5:44 PM

 I did too...hahahaha


Quoting DDDaysh:

Damn you, I almost burst out laughing at that!  

Quoting whatIknownow:

I think it's the ghetto version of whack-a-mole.

Quoting sandeeyo:

Isn't slapahoe like a game or something?

 

Quoting whatIknownow:

 

The harassment charges will be dropped due to, it's not actually harassment. And slapahoe will land you in jail with the other criminals.

Quoting OvertiredMommy:

I see whackjobs have told ya not to read them, but I would either file harrassment charges or go slapahoe on her

 

 

 

 

 

 



 

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