Hi all! I haven't been to cafemom in a while and probably should have to avoid the struggles I'm having today!
Last year I tried disengagement with my stepdaughter after several years of extreme disrespect, bad behavior and school work not up to par. I had a 2 year old son at the time and my time was too wrapped up in discipline than enjoying his young life. My SD has lived in our home since she was 6 and for many years, although I was never treated as mama by her, I did everything! Cheerleading coach, volunteer at school, took her to church...and no, dad did not participate in those activities unless he had to. As she grew a little older the damage by her behavior became worse which tried our marriage but now it is almost to the point that I will leave with my son and move closer to my family out of state.
The disrespect is at an all time high, and I really feel as if I can't take any more. I wanted to have more children and at 34 it's about time for another but honestly I can't imagine living like this for any more time.
Disengagement was a disaster and I'm looking for any advice. Is counseling our only option? How detrimental is this behavior on my son? Would it be better if she went back with her mother? Is it me? I'm open to any ideas. I don't want a divorce but I can't deal with the fighting any longer.