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Need help ASAP. Lawyer just filed for supervised visits for bm

Posted by on Oct. 2, 2013 at 1:09 PM
  • 98 Replies
Long story short, bm got evicted, then moved in with her stepmom. Now she's gotten kicked out of sm's and is living at her dad's apartment. All this information is coming from ss. He told us in great detail how he helped mom back all their clothes into boxes, so we believe him over mom- who has been caught in more lies than we can keep track of. Bm says she Did NOT move, but she changed her current city to where the new place is on Facebook last week. She's required by CO to notify of all moves 30 days prior since she has a problem retaining housing. Her Dad is a drug addict and we' ve witnessed him smoking pot and buying prescription pills from one of his daughters.
Ss has been acting out, regressing, and generally having a rough time adjusting to the constant instability. It started getting significantly worse once bm moved in with her sm.
Dh called the lawyer today and the lawyer wants to file for a custody modification giving bm only supervised visits.

So what happens now? What kind of information do we need to start getting together? The lawyer is filing the paperwork today, so I don't know how quickly hearings get scheduled.
by on Oct. 2, 2013 at 1:09 PM
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Replies (1-10):
whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Oct. 2, 2013 at 1:11 PM
1 mom liked this

I'm confused. Why does mom need supervised visits?

teaspring
by on Oct. 2, 2013 at 1:12 PM

Where I live, which is NC, you can figure a first hearing scheduled anywhere from 30-45 days from the date of filing.  That's pretty typical here, but I couldn't say that it's written in stone...

dawnnamarie
by Silver Member on Oct. 2, 2013 at 1:13 PM
mainly because she's lying about where she's living and has gotten kicked out of two apartments in the past 3 months. She's now moved in with her drug addict father and Dh doesn't feel that it's a safe place for ss to be spending the night.

Quoting whatIknownow:

I'm confused. Why does mom need supervised visits?

whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Oct. 2, 2013 at 1:14 PM
1 mom liked this

I can see that as a reason for wanting to file for custody, but I don't see what that requires her visits to be supervised. I can also see requesting the court to order no overnight visits as long as she's living with her father. But still not seeing the need for supervised visits.


Quoting dawnnamarie:

mainly because she's lying about where she's living and has gotten kicked out of two apartments in the past 3 months. She's now moved in with her drug addict father and Dh doesn't feel that it's a safe place for ss to be spending the night.

Quoting whatIknownow:

I'm confused. Why does mom need supervised visits?



dawnnamarie
by Silver Member on Oct. 2, 2013 at 1:15 PM
Damn. I was hoping it would be sooner. The lawyer said we can't file for emergency custody, because Dh already has primary custody- and that would be the only way to get something done quickly.

Quoting teaspring:

Where I live, which is NC, you can figure a first hearing scheduled anywhere from 30-45 days from the date of filing.  That's pretty typical here, but I couldn't say that it's written in stone...

whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Oct. 2, 2013 at 1:16 PM

what is the parenting time split?

If Dh is custodial, does it really matter if her living conditions are unstable? How often does she have SS with her?

dawnnamarie
by Silver Member on Oct. 2, 2013 at 1:17 PM
That'a what Dh was wanting. The lawyer was the one who suggested going for supervised visits until her situation improves.

Our primary goal is to at least get her Wednesday and Thursday overnights taken away. I think the lawyer is just being a bit over zealous


Quoting whatIknownow:

I can see that as a reason for wanting to file for custody, but I don't see what that requires her visits to be supervised. I can also see requesting the court to order no overnight visits as long as she's living with her father. But still not seeing the need for supervised visits.



Quoting dawnnamarie:

mainly because she's lying about where she's living and has gotten kicked out of two apartments in the past 3 months. She's now moved in with her drug addict father and Dh doesn't feel that it's a safe place for ss to be spending the night.



Quoting whatIknownow:

I'm confused. Why does mom need supervised visits?




whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Oct. 2, 2013 at 1:19 PM


yes I think he's being overzealous and it could back fire. I think a reasonable request would be to ask for no overnights until she is no longer living with her druggie father. Provided you can prove he is a druggie.

Quoting dawnnamarie:

That'a what Dh was wanting. The lawyer was the one who suggested going for supervised visits until her situation improves.

Our primary goal is to at least get her Wednesday and Thursday overnights taken away. I think the lawyer is just being a bit over zealous


Quoting whatIknownow:

I can see that as a reason for wanting to file for custody, but I don't see what that requires her visits to be supervised. I can also see requesting the court to order no overnight visits as long as she's living with her father. But still not seeing the need for supervised visits.



Quoting dawnnamarie:

mainly because she's lying about where she's living and has gotten kicked out of two apartments in the past 3 months. She's now moved in with her drug addict father and Dh doesn't feel that it's a safe place for ss to be spending the night.



Quoting whatIknownow:

I'm confused. Why does mom need supervised visits?






Tinkerbellmama
by Platinum Member on Oct. 2, 2013 at 1:20 PM

BM only has SD EOWE (EOW during the summer, but BM only acutally took 2 full weeks this last summer), but her instability of living situations (along with the fact that BM is also very emotionally unstable at times) GREATLY effected SD. SD never knew where she was going to be, where she was going to be sleeping, who she was going to be around...

SD is much older than OP's SS, but it really does effect the child if there's zero stability in the NC household.

Quoting whatIknownow:

what is the parenting time split?

If Dh is custodial, does it really matter if her living conditions are unstable? How often does she have SS with her?



LyndaLoo78
by Skeletor on Oct. 2, 2013 at 1:22 PM
1 mom liked this

WIKN, the logic behind filing for supervised visits is this:  Ask for the moon.  Supervised visits seems unreasonable right?  Yes.  It makes BF as primary CP and no overnights much more patable to a judge.  

Quoting whatIknownow:

I can see that as a reason for wanting to file for custody, but I don't see what that requires her visits to be supervised. I can also see requesting the court to order no overnight visits as long as she's living with her father. But still not seeing the need for supervised visits.


Quoting dawnnamarie:

mainly because she's lying about where she's living and has gotten kicked out of two apartments in the past 3 months. She's now moved in with her drug addict father and Dh doesn't feel that it's a safe place for ss to be spending the night.

Quoting whatIknownow:

I'm confused. Why does mom need supervised visits?




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