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Update: My son not invited to sister-in-laws wedding

Posted by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:32 PM
  • 55 Replies
1 mom liked this

Update.   The wedding is tomorrow and none of us are going!



have been married for 2 years.  I have 1 son and DH has 1 daughter.  We are an inter-racial couple and have had major challenges blending our family.  My sister in law is renewing her marriage vows and having the wedding she could not afford to have 25 years ago.  DH and SD are both in the wedding.  I asked DH if my son was invited and he told me he would have to ask his sister.  My son is 16 years old.  He later came back and told me his sister hesitated to say yes because of "money". DH told her not to worry about it!

I am so hurt!!  I bend over backwards for his family.  I gave his sister $100 dollars when she was raising money for her mission trip to Africa last summer and never even got a thank-you. I have always been there for her and feel so incredibly hurt by this. 

The weekend of the wedding is our weekend with both kids.  I told DH I was not going to the wedding and he is very upset. Any advice would be great!

Am I supposed to leave my 16 years old here alone and tell him he was not invited to the "family" wedding??  No WAY!!!



by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:32 PM
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Replies (1-10):
momof2ex1
by Ruby Member on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:35 PM
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I wouldn't go to the wedding either. I don't have anything to do with people that exclude my children. It would be totally different if this were an adult function and no children were invited but since his daughter is going and your child is so close to being an adult - the answer for the no is money and not because adults only are allowed - I would stay home and tell my husband to shove it.
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OvrMyHead
by Silver Member on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:40 PM

This is total BS.  I wouldn't attend either.

OvertiredMommy
by Member on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:41 PM
I wouldn"t go either.
Lotusflower_21
by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:43 PM

Thank you!!  I know I am going to be hurt when he goes to the wedding knowing my son is not welcome.  He is in the wedding so I know he cant blow it off.  This SUCKS!!  My husband got mad when I said "I guess she doesnt what her white nephew at the wedding."  I was just soooooooo mad!!  I include his family in everything!!

LnAsMommy
by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:43 PM
I wouldn't go. If my son wasn't invited then I wouldn't feel like I was either.
reche1978
by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:46 PM
1 mom liked this

that is crap hes 16 so thats almost an adult its not like he's a toddler but no if there is no room for my kid then theres no room for me

annabl1970
by Gold Member on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:50 PM
4 moms liked this
I think weddings are personal business of the groom and bride.
If they don't want your son there, that is their decision. I fully understand why you don't want to attend. That is your right. Don't be mad at your H though. It's not his faulth.
I would cut any ties with SIL.
I Can't stand racist morons.
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Lotusflower_21
by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:51 PM

Any advice on how to manage my emotions toward DH.  I am hurt and MAD!!

soonergirl980
by Gold Member on Oct. 12, 2013 at 4:43 PM

I don't really understand being hurt about this. You have been married for 2 years and your son is a 16 year old boy. Weddings are for the bride and groom not for anyone else they should not be obligated to invite anyone let alone a 16 year old boy they have known a couple of years.

leegirl_jm
by Platinum Member on Oct. 12, 2013 at 4:56 PM

I think it is a bit odd to invite all the members of a family to your wedding except their 16 year old son, however people have different familial relationships, clearly both your husband and his sister don't see your son as a member of their family and the bride gets to decide who attends her  wedding.

I am not sure why your husband would be upset with you refusing to attend though. Are you the custodial parent of your son?

Career Woman, Wife and Mother of Two Children, a Girl and a Boy.

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