She started off by apologizing for texting me so often instead of BF. She explained that bf often forgets to text me about pick up times and she just takes the reigns. I laughed and said, "well, we're moms and just better at that kind of thing".
Its nice having a level of respect between us. I understand she's the woman/mother of that house and she understands that I'm the custodial parent. And I don't get my panties in a bunch when she picks up bf's slack because in any marriage the man and woman naturally take on different roles that compliment one another and it actually makes bf more reliable when it comes to my DS so its only a benefit to him.
And considering the crap dH & I put up with HIS ex, its really nice to have some sanity and mature adult contact in these situations!