Ok the reason why I joined this group was because I just started dating a wonderful man, we have been together for a few months and its that time to meet his older son, ( He has two children CD who is 11 years old an JD who is a beautiful 2 year old) I have already meet JD because of the young age DD figured it wouldnt hurt. CD is another story, CD has a lot of abandonment issues, he is striving to find that "mommy figure" and has been hurt emotionally repeated by DD's previous ex's even CD own mother isnt well suited. I have two children of my own but they are much younger than CD.
DD mentioned last night that he had a very good conversation about me to CD, the first about my existance which started becasue I had cleaned the house this weekend while the family was away. CD stated that he didnt mind who his father dated anymore but that he wasnt ready to meet me. I'm unsure how I feel about that, but I understand where CD is coming from, being hurt in the past has left this young, bright impressionable child "wounded". My question is, when CD is ready to meet me how should I aopproach this? I'm entering it not trying to replace his mother or the fond memories he has of DD's previous ex who was around for the better part of three years. I would like to be a friend first and let CD make up his own mind about me. I already care deeply for both children and want wahts best for them, I am what you call a kind hearted women an truly want to make a great first impression on CD. yes in child terms "I want him to really like me" I can see a beautiful future with his father but I know in order for that future to come his children have to be as excepting of me as DD is. Please help.. I'm very nervous about the entire situation and just want it to go well.