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You're not really her mom, right?

Posted by on Nov. 18, 2013 at 9:02 PM
  • 41 Replies

I'm 25, almost 26.  I look like i'm 15.  I get it all the time...not complaining, just saying.

So my SD wanted to go to my place of employment and take a tour.  Its a tourist location, and its historical, so I figured sure, why not.  My son is 2.5 and wouldn't do well on an hour long tour.  So I took SD and DH stayed with our son.

Because I work there, the tour guides know me.  Our tour guide referred to me, and my SD as my daughter.  (I've always referred to her in conversation as my SD, but he just called her my daughter.  She didn't mind, and I didn't see the point in announcing to everyone 'oh no...no no, she's not MY kid. '  I know my SD and I think she would take that in a negative way).

So in the middle of the tour, a woman stops me and says,

"She's not really your daughter, is she?"

I was slightly taken aback at her confidence that SD could not possibly be mine.  I mean, she looks like she could be...(until you see her mom).  I would have been 17 when she was born.  So, its definitely possible. 

I simply said, "No, he's mistaken, she's my SD.  Great kid, huh?"

 

And then she said "Oh, well I'm really surprised.  Usually stepmoms are mean!  She really seems to like you."

She was very nice, and I could tell she didn't mean it in a mean way, but i was really kind of shocked that so many people think that!  I came home and told DH about it and he wasn't surprised in the least. 

Has this ever happened to you guys? 

by on Nov. 18, 2013 at 9:02 PM
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Replies (1-10):
soonergirl980
by Gold Member on Nov. 18, 2013 at 9:06 PM
1 mom liked this

I have had that happen to me with my own children. I tend to look quite young for my age both of my oldest 2 are taller than me. When DS14 was about 4 weeks old he was in a snow suit and someone thought he was one of those home ec dolls.

lovemyfriend
by Bronze Member on Nov. 18, 2013 at 9:15 PM

hahaha, ohh...i'm sorry.  Thats pretty good though.


Quoting soonergirl980:

I have had that happen to me with my own children. I tend to look quite young for my age both of my oldest 2 are taller than me. When DS14 was about 4 weeks old he was in a snow suit and someone thought he was one of those home ec dolls.


 

runinpinkshoes
by Silver Member on Nov. 18, 2013 at 9:24 PM
1 mom liked this

Ugh, I spent the first year of my stint as SM dispelling the myth that SMs are mean. Hard to fight those stereotypes!

whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Nov. 18, 2013 at 9:27 PM

A total stranger said to you, "usually stepmoms are mean?"

Not really buying that. Sorry.


Quoting lovemyfriend:


And then she said "Oh, well I'm really surprised.  Usually stepmoms are mean!  She really seems to like you."



Tinkerbellmama
by Platinum Member on Nov. 18, 2013 at 9:27 PM

I'm 30 and look very young. DS is in choir and had a performance at a local high school. 6 elementary schools, a middle school, and a high school. I had a few people who thought I was one of the high school students, LOL.

I've been told how nice it is of me to help out with my younger siblings (AKA my children).

I've had someone ask my mom if it was OK if the "kids" got a piece of candy while pointing gestering first to me and then to my children.

When DH and I first got together we went out to eat (I was 18 and he was 22) we had SD and the waitress asked if DH wanted TWO kids menus...

 I've also had quite a few people point out that SD and I have an excellent relationship "especially considering I'm her step-mom."

minimoo
by Gold Member on Nov. 18, 2013 at 9:29 PM



Quoting soonergirl980:

I have had that happen to me with my own children. I tend to look quite young for my age both of my oldest 2 are taller than me. When DS14 was about 4 weeks old he was in a snow suit and someone thought he was one of those home ec dolls.


luckystars2012
by Gold Member on Nov. 18, 2013 at 9:33 PM
2 moms liked this

LOL heck people ask my if my own DD is mine.  I look young.  I'm 26, but I'm 5' and fluctuate between a size 4-7 (thank you thyroid issues) when I'm not pregnant.  I get carded to buy alcohol, cigarettes (for j, I dont smoke unless im drinking, which is very very rare), etc.  I constantly get told that I dont look any older than 16-17, so my 6yo dd cant POSSIBLY be mine!

Im 35 weeks pregnant right now, so weve had some interesting moments, especially when I'm out with DD and 9yo SS.  I had one lady actually say "youd think after being a teen mom once youd learn what birth control was!" bad for her, I was drinking water at the time and I spit it all over her because I busted out laughing.  

minimoo
by Gold Member on Nov. 18, 2013 at 9:35 PM
Dammit! Hit add reply before I wrote anything lol.

I get the same thing. I look really young for my age too. I got carded when I went to go see Bridesmaids (trying to remember when that was out- I think I was 28). The guy, practically a kid himself, asked where I got my "fake" ID bc it was "so good it looks real". I laughed and said it was real. People always tell me "you are WAY too young to have 3 kids, let alone a 10 yo". ODD is my Minime (ds is dh's Minime and YDD looks like a combo of the two of us), so when we are out, people will ask if we are sisters. I did become a mom young though.


Quoting soonergirl980:

I have had that happen to me with my own children. I tend to look quite young for my age both of my oldest 2 are taller than me. When DS14 was about 4 weeks old he was in a snow suit and someone thought he was one of those home ec dolls.


newstepmom61811
by on Nov. 18, 2013 at 9:38 PM
That's the qualifier I've gotten several times...the "considering your the SM" qualifier at the end of whatever "compliment" they're paying like they shouldn't be paying me a compliment...like the expectation is that things between SKs and SMs are always bad...that SKs and I are the exception the rule "considering I'm the SM"...I hate that qualifier...


Quoting Tinkerbellmama:

I'm 30 and look very young. DS is in choir and had a performance at a local high school. 6 elementary schools, a middle school, and a high school. I had a few people who thought I was one of the high school students, LOL.

I've been told how nice it is of me to help out with my younger siblings (AKA my children).

I've had someone ask my mom if it was OK if the "kids" got a piece of candy while pointing gestering first to me and then to my children.

When DH and I first got together we went out to eat (I was 18 and he was 22) we had SD and the waitress asked if DH wanted TWO kids menus...

 I've also had quite a few people point out that SD and I have an excellent relationship "especially considering I'm her step-mom."


soonergirl980
by Gold Member on Nov. 18, 2013 at 9:39 PM

I got my real id taken by a bouncer when I was 28 lol I was a young mom as well had DS when I was 18 but I looked about 11. DH has actually been told he should know better than to be with someone so young. I am a year older than him lol.

Quoting minimoo:

Dammit! Hit add reply before I wrote anything lol.

I get the same thing. I look really young for my age too. I got carded when I went to go see Bridesmaids (trying to remember when that was out- I think I was 28). The guy, practically a kid himself, asked where I got my "fake" ID bc it was "so good it looks real". I laughed and said it was real. People always tell me "you are WAY too young to have 3 kids, let alone a 10 yo". ODD is my Minime (ds is dh's Minime and YDD looks like a combo of the two of us), so when we are out, people will ask if we are sisters. I did become a mom young though.


Quoting soonergirl980:

I have had that happen to me with my own children. I tend to look quite young for my age both of my oldest 2 are taller than me. When DS14 was about 4 weeks old he was in a snow suit and someone thought he was one of those home ec dolls.



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