Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Exhausted..SD not sleeping through the night.. Imaginary friends

Posted by on Nov. 21, 2013 at 6:38 PM
  • 60 Replies
Please forgive me if it seems I am rude, brief or frustrated. I'm pregnant, sleep deprived (and randomly nauseous even though I'm 20 weeks)

I would type a background but honestly it's a pain in the butt to type on this phone and all the pertinent information would take too long. DH has primary with BM having EOWE.

For the most part, things have been great. SD is thriving in Prek, she has adjusted well to her routine.

That is until a few weeks ago. She has always been a little high strung and clingy. She has had some emotional issues. But overall things have been good until recently.

She has started waking up anywhere from 1 to 5 times a night. Sometimes she wakes up screaming and crying.. Freaking out about anything from a lost sippy cup to thinking that Daddy or I have left her.

Sometimes she doesn't cry but she'll call out to us as she walks through the house until she gets to our room. Then she tells me she needs me.

She has also gotten upset if I take a phone call in my room, take the trash out, or go to the bathroom. She is my shadow. She recently became upset and started crying because my MIL asked if she wanted to come spend the night.. Which she normally loves. She said she didn't want to leave me. She wakes all of us (Dd, DH and I) each time.

Most upsetting.. I overhead her talking to 2 imaginary friends in her room. One I assumed to be a girl based on the way she had her voice. But while talking to this friend she became panicked and asked that friend to leave because her other "friend" Trap was coming and he would be mad if he saw them talking and would hurt her. Her conversation with Trap was frightening. She sounded terrified and kept begging him not to hurt her and to stop telling her to do bad things. Her voice was different with this friend.

DH is trying to make an appointment with her counselor but between school and the holidays he was not able to make an appointment for this week. She hasn't mentioned him anymore.

We asked her about Trap and she got quiet. Said she doesn't know anyone named Trap and told us she didn't want to talk about it anymore.

When she was 3 she used to talk about "the bad man" who would keep her up at night. She even cried (like sobbing, desperate tears.. When she was 3)and asked my MIL to get a knife and kill the bad man so he would leave her alone.

Anyway, I know she's been through a lot. I expected her to have adjustment issues.. But we're really worried about her and we're all exhausted. It seemed to come out of nowhere when she was doing so well. She has even been asking me to quit my job and stay home with them.

I'm not sure if I expect advice from this or if I just needed to get it out.

I told BM about all of this and her suggestion was to hang crosses over all of our doorways to keep out the evil spirits and that she would have their church pastor pray with her and bless her.

Sorry this is so long.
by on Nov. 21, 2013 at 6:38 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
amanda_mom89
by Gold Member on Nov. 21, 2013 at 6:42 PM
I can't even tell if this includes everything I need to say in a coherent manner. I feel like I rambled.
Polkadotted
by Gold Member on Nov. 21, 2013 at 6:49 PM

Do you believe in spirits? I have had things happen here that I just can't explain.  I went to the Haunted Realm group here and they picked up on things in my pictures that were similar to what I experienced.  I'm not sure that I believe in all that, but it was interesting.

I think children are more receptive to things and I know there are a lot of things I can't explain.

KnowItAll
by Silver Member on Nov. 21, 2013 at 6:51 PM
Has she been abused before? Do you suspect abuse now?
Polkadotted
by Gold Member on Nov. 21, 2013 at 6:54 PM

Come to think of it, my ex husband's cousin had an imaginary friend named "Trap" when he was little.

HopesNDreams
by Silver Member on Nov. 21, 2013 at 6:55 PM
Have you considered getting a video monitor for her room? I feel like I would want to see what was happening when she is getting up. I would also want to record the conversations with the imaginary friends for her therapist. Some monitors are also two way, so you or DH could reassure her without her leaving her room.

Also, try going to Build a Bear. Have DH fill the heart wil love and strength, messages to keep bad dreams away, etc. They also gave recordable sound chips, so he could record a loving message or short lullaby too that she could hear when she squeezes the bear.

The Trap thing would worry me.
amanda_mom89
by Gold Member on Nov. 21, 2013 at 6:58 PM
DH was concerned with some of the ways BM saw fit to discipline (ex: smacking SD in the face for touching the dryer after she was asked not to)

He did not have proof of those behaviors during the custody case so it was not brought up.

BM did use benadryl routinely and above the recommended amount to get SD to sleep. DH does have proof of that and it was part of his argument for custody.

We don't currently suspect any abuse. We also do not think BM is still giving benadryl and we even feel her discipline is completely different. For starters, BM lives with her mom and her son goes to dad's house on the weekends SD is there. So she has a much lighter load. Less stress, less time. I think BM parents a lot better this way because she doesn't get stressed to the point of snapping like she did before.


Quoting KnowItAll:

Has she been abused before? Do you suspect abuse now?

amanda_mom89
by Gold Member on Nov. 21, 2013 at 6:59 PM
Idk.. There are things in this world I can't explain but I'm not even religious. I have a hard time believing in spiritual things/ideas.


Quoting Polkadotted:

Do you believe in spirits? I have had things happen here that I just can't explain.  I went to the Haunted Realm group here and they picked up on things in my pictures that were similar to what I experienced.  I'm not sure that I believe in all that, but it was interesting.

I think children are more receptive to things and I know there are a lot of things I can't explain.


amanda_mom89
by Gold Member on Nov. 21, 2013 at 7:02 PM
A video monitor has been suggested but we're not running out to purchase one. DH says he wants to know what the counselor suggests.

The build a bear thing is a good idea.


Quoting HopesNDreams:

Have you considered getting a video monitor for her room? I feel like I would want to see what was happening when she is getting up. I would also want to record the conversations with the imaginary friends for her therapist. Some monitors are also two way, so you or DH could reassure her without her leaving her room.



Also, try going to Build a Bear. Have DH fill the heart wil love and strength, messages to keep bad dreams away, etc. They also gave recordable sound chips, so he could record a loving message or short lullaby too that she could hear when she squeezes the bear.



The Trap thing would worry me.

Lorena
by Bronze Member on Nov. 21, 2013 at 7:05 PM
My sd has been acting like that but with out the friends. Have you tried to open the door while "trap" was there? Is bm in an abusive relationship? Do you think sd could be abused or see abuse? Has custody just changed?
My ds had a bad man that would tell him he was going to kill his family. This came about just after dh got custody of skids.
Polkadotted
by Gold Member on Nov. 21, 2013 at 7:09 PM

Do you have any friends with babies that have one you could borrow?

Quoting amanda_mom89:

A video monitor has been suggested but we're not running out to purchase one. DH says he wants to know what the counselor suggests.

The build a bear thing is a good idea.


Quoting HopesNDreams:

Have you considered getting a video monitor for her room? I feel like I would want to see what was happening when she is getting up. I would also want to record the conversations with the imaginary friends for her therapist. Some monitors are also two way, so you or DH could reassure her without her leaving her room.



Also, try going to Build a Bear. Have DH fill the heart wil love and strength, messages to keep bad dreams away, etc. They also gave recordable sound chips, so he could record a loving message or short lullaby too that she could hear when she squeezes the bear.



The Trap thing would worry me.


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)



Featured