Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Stepmom Central Stepmom Central

Starting to wonder if ss is being touched....

Posted by on Dec. 10, 2013 at 9:06 PM
  • 41 Replies
So, while I'm trying to figure out the other issue, this is what else has been going on. I'm praying that it's just a normal phase but it's sort of alarming.

Ss has became obsessed with butts. He started by coming into the bathroom when dd was bathing and grabbed her butt. Then about a week later I heard dd screaming from the playroom. When I got upstairs, ss had his pants and undies pulled down asking dd to touch his butt. It calmed down for a couple weeks after that. But last night, ss came into the bathroom while dd was bathing and took a picture of her. Then this morning, he came into the bathroom and watched her pee. When we asked why he said he wanted to watch her because he loved her.

Each time, we've talked about the bathroom being off limits when someone's in there and that it's not ok to touch someone's private parts. It's just overwhelming. We got an appointment scheduled with the dr so she can talk to him about everything and see if something's going on- but it's all really fucking too much to deal with.
Dh thinks that ss just thinks butts are funny and he'll grow out of it. We've never been great about making the kids close doors, because they need help cleaning themselves and stuff like that sometimes. We have put a new closed door policy in effect starting immediately though.
by on Dec. 10, 2013 at 9:06 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
lovemyfriend
by Bronze Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 9:09 PM

no clue...at all.  How old is your SS again?  If my SD did this more than once, I'd be worried...I remember when she gave her dad a goodnight kiss and stuck her tongue in his mouth...he was so freaked out.  I think his reaction made it VERY clear that that is NOT ok...never happened again.  So, after the initial weird out, I figured it was just a "what happens if" moment...

Not sure about the mulitple occurances, but I haven't ever had to deal with it.

dawnnamarie
by Silver Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 9:25 PM
He's 5. We keep telling him that it's not ok. But it keeps happening

Quoting lovemyfriend:

no clue...at all.  How old is your SS again?  If my SD did this more than once, I'd be worried...I remember when she gave her dad a goodnight kiss and stuck her tongue in his mouth...he was so freaked out.  I think his reaction made it VERY clear that that is NOT ok...never happened again.  So, after the initial weird out, I figured it was just a "what happens if" moment...


Not sure about the mulitple occurances, but I haven't ever had to deal with it.

MommySabs
by Gold Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 9:27 PM
The butt thing- most kids think butts are funny, my kids have all been there. The second part with the photo and the bathroom i have no clue how to help you there.
lovemyfriend
by Bronze Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 9:31 PM

 have you asked him why?  besides that its funny?  Without leading him or anything.

I agree with mommysabs here.  I think I would just talk to the kid, or make it clear that I did not approve or enjoy the attention on butts.  maybe no negative/positive attention at all?  Maybe it is just a phase.

Quoting dawnnamarie: He's 5. We keep telling him that it's not ok. But it keeps happening

Quoting lovemyfriend:

no clue...at all.  How old is your SS again?  If my SD did this more than once, I'd be worried...I remember when she gave her dad a goodnight kiss and stuck her tongue in his mouth...he was so freaked out.  I think his reaction made it VERY clear that that is NOT ok...never happened again.  So, after the initial weird out, I figured it was just a "what happens if" moment...


Not sure about the mulitple occurances, but I haven't ever had to deal with it.

 

dawnnamarie
by Silver Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 9:37 PM
I guess the part that's really bugging me is that we've talked to him about privates and all that each time. He just doesn't seem to get it or understand that it's not ok.

I was so mad about the camera thing that I almost threw it in the trash. Idk how I stayed calm enough to talk to him!! :( well, actually I calmly told him to go to his room and went into the garage and ranted to myself to calm down!! Lol


Quoting MommySabs: The butt thing- most kids think butts are funny, my kids have all been there. The second part with the photo and the bathroom i have no clue how to help you there.
dawnnamarie
by Silver Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 9:37 PM
We've talked to him. I've talked to him alone. Dh has talked to him... :(

He just doesn't seem to get it :(


Quoting lovemyfriend:

 have you asked him why?  besides that its funny?  Without leading him or anything.


I agree with mommysabs here.  I think I would just talk to the kid, or make it clear that I did not approve or enjoy the attention on butts.  maybe no negative/positive attention at all?  Maybe it is just a phase.


Quoting dawnnamarie: He's 5. We keep telling him that it's not ok. But it keeps happening


Quoting lovemyfriend:

no clue...at all.  How old is your SS again?  If my SD did this more than once, I'd be worried...I remember when she gave her dad a goodnight kiss and stuck her tongue in his mouth...he was so freaked out.  I think his reaction made it VERY clear that that is NOT ok...never happened again.  So, after the initial weird out, I figured it was just a "what happens if" moment...



Not sure about the mulitple occurances, but I haven't ever had to deal with it.


 

minimoo
by Gold Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 10:28 PM
This is what I was going to say. Ds6 thinks butts are the funniest thing ever invented. He went through a boob having stage when he was younger too. Not sure with the rest.

Quoting MommySabs: The butt thing- most kids think butts are funny, my kids have all been there. The second part with the photo and the bathroom i have no clue how to help you there.
dawnnamarie
by Silver Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 10:30 PM
Maybe it's more normal than I thought!

Quoting minimoo: This is what I was going to say. Ds6 thinks butts are the funniest thing ever invented. He went through a boob having stage when he was younger too. Not sure with the rest.



Quoting MommySabs: The butt thing- most kids think butts are funny, my kids have all been there. The second part with the photo and the bathroom i have no clue how to help you there.
KnowItAll
by Silver Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 10:33 PM
I think it's very normal and not an indication that he's being touched.
dawnnamarie
by Silver Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 10:34 PM
Any idea how to make it stop?

Quoting KnowItAll: I think it's very normal and not an indication that he's being touched.
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN