My name is Monica, I have been married for 12 years with 15yo step daughter, a 11yo daughter, and 10yo son. As a stepfamily we have had our ups and downs like any family over the years. I myself as a step mom have tried my best to build a strong relationship with my stepdaughter over the years and had felt I had done well in doing so balancing boundaries, relationships, and everything that comes along with step parenting, until recent. I know the teenage years are hard for any parent but seems especially so as a step parent, at least in my case! How do you balance the boundaries, maintain the standards you set in your home, and continue a positive relationship when your teenage daughter is pushing the boundaries herself? She is a good kid overall but as of recent about the last 2 months has made some poor decisions that if she were my own bio daughter or son would of had consequences. I understand I am the step mom but her BM contacted me told me of consequences and asked we follow the same when she is at our house and asked the same of my husband...we agreed. Perfect...right?! We communicate, all agree, everyones on the same page! Wrong after she comes to our house, my husband working most of time she was with us, and I reinforce consequence I become evil SM! She was upset regarding consequences...rude and disrespectful. Then goes to BM house who.doesn't follow through with consequences and rewards step daughter with concert tickets? My husband spoke to step daughter and told her to apologize....it's been 2 weeks...no apology same attitude towards me. I refuse to allow her to treat me disrespectful especially with younger ones watching her. How do I set same values for my bk kids when they see the difference themselves?! Never realized step parenting would become more difficult after 12 yrs.
on Jan. 12, 2014 at 12:16 PM