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*ETA* Really BM?! *vent* *picture*

Posted by on Jan. 20, 2014 at 8:47 AM
  • 118 Replies

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Ok...BM has always annoyed me, but she and I never talk- my df always deals with her.

Df's son(4) came over Saturday and stayed the night. This is the first time we have seen him since December 21st. At that time, BM told us that she was taking ss to get new shoes as part of his Christmas because he needed some new ones and she thought his current ones were getting to small because he would say they hurt. When I asked her what size shoe he wore, she said she wasn't sure and told me to check his shoe- which was an 11. She also made the statement, "I think he wears a 12 now, which is basically the same size as a 1 , the ones would just be a tad bigger and he likes his shoes a little loose."

Well, I used to wonder why ss wanted df to carry him all the time...now I know. The poor child should be wearing an 8-8.5 and she bought him size 12 shoes! His old shoes were an 11, so even they were to big!

Sorry, I needed to vent....

*ETA*

First, yes I did delete the bottom portion of the op because while other things are going on, my main intention was to vent about his shoes.

I am most likely done replying to this post. I wanted to vent, not explain everything about me and my df's lives.

We offered to buy him shoes for Christmas- before we realized that his shoes didn't fit- we were told that we could but that anything we bought would stay at our house, so if we bought him shoes, he would only wear them at our house.

Now that we know they are to big, df plans to take him the next time he is over and get him shoes that fit.
Once he has the new shoes, he plans on telling bm that he got shoes that fit and sending him home in them. If he comes back in the shoes that are to big, we will ask for the shoes we bought back and just deal with knowing that she won't put him in shoes that actually fit him.


by on Jan. 20, 2014 at 8:47 AM
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Replies (1-10):
whatIknownow
by Ruby Member on Jan. 20, 2014 at 8:55 AM
9 moms liked this

I think you should just focus on your own life. Your boyfriend doesnt' even have court-ordered visitation. If he really wants to be a father he should go get set visitation. He barely even sees his child. Until then, you are just focusing on petty nonsense things.

Eternity807
by Bronze Member on Jan. 20, 2014 at 8:56 AM
2 moms liked this

Sounds like a sad situation for SS.  Your DH needs to go to court and get scheduled visitation set up.  If DH has issues with how SS is being treated and cared for with BM, he needs to take steps to change it.   

20mommy14
by on Jan. 20, 2014 at 9:02 AM
He didn't have a lawyer or a job at the time it was all set up and she had told him if he didn't temporarily gave up custody she wouldn't let him see his son. Like I said, he didn't have a lawyer at the time so he didn't think there was much he could do in court. His ex's attorney wrote up an agreement and he signed it infront of the judge. He plans on filing his appeal in March now that he has a job and can provide for his son without help.

Quoting whatIknownow:

I think you should just focus on your own life. Your boyfriend doesnt' even have court-ordered visitation. If he really wants to be a father he should go get set visitation. He barely even sees his child. Until then, you are just focusing on petty nonsense things.

CrunchMaMaBear
by Queen Crunch on Jan. 20, 2014 at 9:03 AM
3 moms liked this
His shoes should be the least of your concerns
20mommy14
by on Jan. 20, 2014 at 9:04 AM
He plans on filing his appeal to the court order around March.

Quoting Eternity807:

Sounds like a sad situation for SS.  Your DH needs to go to court and get scheduled visitation set up.  If DH has issues with how SS is being treated and cared for with BM, he needs to take steps to change it.   

tiafez
by Silver Member on Jan. 20, 2014 at 9:22 AM
2 moms liked this

I think if he wants to be a Father he needs to step up and get visitation. She is allowing him time with his son, that's nice of her. If he stood in front of a judge to sing papers and didn't speak up then there isprobably more to this than what you've told us. 

20mommy14
by on Jan. 20, 2014 at 9:29 AM
I told him to try and do all he could in court, but he only spoke up when they asked if he agreed to allowing her full custody. He said it was fine, but wanted to make sure it was only temporary because at that time we didn't have a place and he wouldn't have been able to provide his son with what he needed at the time. He was told that BM was asking for it to be permanent, but the judge would allow him to appeal and re-file at any time. He plans to do so by March.

Quoting tiafez:

I think if he wants to be a Father he needs to step up and get visitation. She is allowing him time with his son, that's nice of her. If he stood in front of a judge to sing papers and didn't speak up then there isprobably more to this than what you've told us. 

packermom4ever
by Still The Queen on Jan. 20, 2014 at 11:22 AM
2 moms liked this

Really, SM?!  This is petty. 

20mommy14
by on Jan. 20, 2014 at 11:28 AM
So I'm wrong to be upset that she makes her kid wear shoes 3 sizes to big? It can damage his feet! I wouldn't want to wear shoes that were 3 sizes to big. We are taking him to buy shoes for when he comes over, but it just baffles me how a mother can let their child wear shoes that obviously don't fit.

Quoting packermom4ever:

Really, SM?!  This is petty. 

pepper504
by Gold Member on Jan. 20, 2014 at 11:30 AM
2 moms liked this

He "temporarily" gave up custody?  How is that?  Especially when, more than likely, BM had custody to begin with.  That makes no sense, legally, at all in what you are describing.

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