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Moving and custody help needed ASAP :)

Posted by on Feb. 1, 2014 at 11:39 AM
  • 73 Replies
Ok, I also posted this in mc. Here's the hypothetical sitch.

I have an opportunity for a huge promotion that would double our income. (Not true yet, but I have been mentoring with the woman who is in that position and she's almost ready to retire)

Dh is cp. The co just says that the other parent must be notified 30 days prior to a move. We would be moving about 8 hours away.

What's the chances that we would be able to move and take ss with us? What would we have to do?
by on Feb. 1, 2014 at 11:39 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Sept-babies2
by Patriot's Fan on Feb. 1, 2014 at 12:10 PM
Sorry i'm no help..i don't know if you could move that far away from the other parent.
dawnnamarie
by Silver Member on Feb. 1, 2014 at 12:15 PM
I did figure out that my state requires the parent requesting the move to prove why it's beneficial, which I wouldn't think could be too hard

Quoting Sept-babies2: Sorry i'm no help..i don't know if you could move that far away from the other parent.
PumpkinSpice8
by Silver Member on Feb. 1, 2014 at 12:19 PM
Since there is a CO that says DH has custody and it states the the only thing that has to be done when moving is a 30 day notice, then I'd say you are in the clear to move with SS. You aren't breaking any rule by moving if you've given her notice.

However, she can fight it. It is a change of circumstance, but she'd have to prove her home to be a better home for SS. And while your DH doesn't have to defend anything, if he could show that he was bettering SS's life (higher household income, better schools, etc...) it wouldn't hurt. But that's IF she'd fight it.

Also, it shouldn't matter since you have a moving clause anyhow, but check your state or county custody guidelines and see what the norm is for the area reguarding moving.
progressandjoy
by Silver Member on Feb. 1, 2014 at 12:28 PM
From my understanding, you would just have to give notice. It would be up to her to decide if she wanted to fight it.

If she doesn't respond within the 30 days, you can move.
macbudsmom
by Silver Member on Feb. 1, 2014 at 12:31 PM
Since the move would not guarantee your ss any benefits since you have no obligation to him and it would keep him from his mom I am guessing it would be hard to get this approved in court.m
leegirl_jm
by Ruby Member on Feb. 1, 2014 at 12:34 PM

What are the chances that BM would fight the move? Is she paying CS? Could you negotiate with her to allow the move?

Polkadotted
by Gold Member on Feb. 1, 2014 at 12:38 PM

We got it approved when we moved for my job.

Quoting macbudsmom: Since the move would not guarantee your ss any benefits since you have no obligation to him and it would keep him from his mom I am guessing it would be hard to get this approved in court.m


macbudsmom
by Silver Member on Feb. 1, 2014 at 12:41 PM
Is that because mom isn't playing an active role?

Quoting Polkadotted:

We got it approved when we moved for my job.

Quoting macbudsmom: Since the move would not guarantee your ss any benefits since you have no obligation to him and it would keep him from his mom I am guessing it would be hard to get this approved in court.m


MomstheBom24
by on Feb. 1, 2014 at 12:44 PM

There's a lot of variables. They will even consider how easily the mother would be able to come and see her child with the kid being 8 hours away. How would the child feel about this btw?

mom2boys664
by Bronze Member on Feb. 1, 2014 at 12:54 PM

I am CBM to DS8 and I gave 30 days and moved 11 hrs away for this reason.  I just sent a letter to the court and one to exdh, although I had already told him this was what I was doing.  I knew he was not going to be happy, but I also knew he wasn't going to do anything about it. It really all depends on what the other parent decides they want to do about it, if anything.  In my case, ex was not exercising his visitation and  seen ds for about 1 hour every other month. It was upsetting for ex's family, but again, not like they really saw ds, it was just the idea of it. 

I take ds back to visit once or twice a year which is completely paid for by me, I pay for my ex's phone so he can call ds (even though he never does) and I have offered to pay for a plane ticket and hotel room if he wanted to come here to visit, but he never has, even though he was unemployed for two years.  Good luck.

 

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