The kids are very gung-ho about the wedding. They have reacted positively to it from the minute they knew. They continue to have questions, talk about what they want to wear, etc. So it's all good.
The weekend that we picked is NOT DF's weekend. He has 50/50 split w BM. He plans to ask BM for the kids for a few hours that day, to be picked up and brought back by his mother. Now, he and I are aware of the of the fact BM may say no, they can't come. DF understands he is taking a huge risk. He has made many concessions for BM over the last 3 years, been flexible, all in the kids best interest.
Now, if BM says no, and refuses to let them attend, it will hurt the kids, because she will be the one saying no, for her own reasons.I think they would be very upset if they didn't go. I ALSO wish we could have done this on a weekend we have them, so there is no question about attendance.But, not to be. It's risky hoping BM will say okay.
Anyone been in this situation as an SM or BM? What did you do if BM?As SM, how would you handle skids disappointment?