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Pity party for me EDIT

Posted by on Mar. 8, 2014 at 3:39 PM
  • 30 Replies
DH and BM are 50/50 with SD14 and SD10. They are with BM right now. I hear nothing from either one when they are with BM. I don't push it, it's her time with them. But today I get a text from SD14 asking me to post a fundraiser for band on my Facebook account. SD14 won't post it on her own, BM doesn't post it, but SD14 wants me to post the info along with pictures I will have to search for on the internet to my Facebook and tag SD14 in it. Just kind of feeling a little used right now and having a pity party. I'm not good enough to text a "hi" to once a week, but now that she needs something from me, SD14 has plenty of time to text. Thanks for the vent space!

EDIT: thanks for all the great advice that I was probably taking this wrong. I'm not polished on my teen speak because some days SD14 can't stop talking and others you can't get two words out of her. I guess SD asked me to post this on my Facebook because my family and friends are always very supportive of any fundraising events so I end up getting a lot of orders that otherwise wouldn't come in. I guess I should thank my lucky stars for what I get. It just hit me wrong that day I guess.
by on Mar. 8, 2014 at 3:39 PM
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Replies (1-10):
malinda74
by Bronze Member on Mar. 8, 2014 at 3:50 PM
Ummm OK. Just have dad do it.
Graceplustwo
by on Mar. 8, 2014 at 4:30 PM
tell her no. pretty simple
WifeyC
by Platinum Member on Mar. 8, 2014 at 4:34 PM

SS's live with me.  The only time I hear from the youngest is when he needs something when he is at his mom's.  DH talks to him everyday.

Birdseed
by Platinum Member on Mar. 8, 2014 at 4:36 PM
3 moms liked this

I think it's pretty normal for kids that age to interact with their parents or other adults only when they need/want something. I don't think it's intended as a slight.  Rather, it's just that they're very ego centric at that age.  The world revolves around them in their minds. 

Honestly, I think it probably bodes well for you that your SD thought to ask you to help out with the fundraiser.  If you don't want to, don't. 

My SDs are now 14 and 16 and we don't just "chit chat" randomly when they're at Mom's  There's always a "reason" for having communication.  They've got friends to talk to in between and when they're around, they're friendly.  It's just the way kids are I think.

Boobear110
by Audra on Mar. 8, 2014 at 4:46 PM
1 mom liked this

I wouldn't take it to heart. She is a teen. It's all about them. They aren't going to text just a hi. They text when they want something. Hell, my oldest is 25 and when he calls me I always answer with what do want child? He says nothing, pretends for 2 seconds that he really didn't want anything , then proceeds with what he wanted. 

It's parenthood we are there when they want something. 

whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Mar. 8, 2014 at 6:07 PM
2 moms liked this

she's 14. That text was her "Hi."

You don't speak 14yo, do you.

sara82lee
by Bronze Member on Mar. 8, 2014 at 7:31 PM
Dad should post stuff on HER Facebook account?

Quoting malinda74: Ummm OK. Just have dad do it.
momof2ex1
by Ruby Member on Mar. 8, 2014 at 10:02 PM
My daughter is almost 13. Granted she lives with me but she only calls me when she needs something lol
She never just texts me or calls to chit chat. There's always a reason. I agree that it's a good sign that she reached out to sm for something she needed. My dd would never contact her dad or sm for anything because they don't have that type of relationship. She would absolutely contact my husband if she needed anything and I wasn't available.

Last night before she left for spring break, she asked him to check on her games (whatever games they play together that you have to check like feeding the animals or letting them out to go potty) while she was gone. She didn't ask me. That's their thing.

Quoting Birdseed:

I think it's pretty normal for kids that age to interact with their parents or other adults only when they need/want something. I don't think it's intended as a slight.  Rather, it's just that they're very ego centric at that age.  The world revolves around them in their minds. 

Honestly, I think it probably bodes well for you that your SD thought to ask you to help out with the fundraiser.  If you don't want to, don't. 

My SDs are now 14 and 16 and we don't just "chit chat" randomly when they're at Mom's  There's always a "reason" for having communication.  They've got friends to talk to in between and when they're around, they're friendly.  It's just the way kids are I think.

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momof2ex1
by Ruby Member on Mar. 8, 2014 at 10:03 PM
1 mom liked this
Sure. Or he could post it to his FB account. And tag his daughter. If sm doesn't want to do it because she is feeling used, tell dad.

Quoting sara82lee: Dad should post stuff on HER Facebook account?

Quoting malinda74: Ummm OK. Just have dad do it.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Lorena
by Bronze Member on Mar. 8, 2014 at 10:04 PM
She is 14. I would just go ahead and do it. Do you text her every now and then just to say hi?
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