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bf dd called me mommy

Posted by on Mar. 27, 2014 at 1:04 AM
  • 14 Replies

My bf daughter just turned three. She lives with her mom 13 hours away. She had previously visited for four weeks, went back to mom for five weeks and is now back with dad. She was supposed to go back to her moms three weeks ago but her mom has made excuses as why she cant meet us half way to pick her up as planned. She hardly calls the daughter. My bf works seven days a week...crazy hours. So i have been babysitting on the weekends to help him out. This weekend she spent the whole day with me and my daughters. Last night when her dad was trying to get her out of the car seat she said, no mommy do it and pointed to me. So i took her out but didnt know if i should say anything about her calling me mommy. I am assuming she heard my girls call me mommy so much lately and that is y she did...however i have been taking care of her a lot. Do i correct her and remind her of my name or say nothing. Shes very young and is probably saying it bc she heard my girls say it. I  my youngest is 8 and calls my bf step dad.  Which doesnt seems to bother him...should we correct this also since we r not married.  I dont want the kids to b confused but we both spend a lot of time with each others kids and have a very commited relationship. We even talk to each others kids on the phone when we dont see each other every day. Where do we set boundries about the names or dont we?...and let kids just b kids and identify for themselvss

by on Mar. 27, 2014 at 1:04 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Shannonb88
by Bronze Member on Mar. 27, 2014 at 1:10 AM
She's only 3. I know you've been taking care of her a lot but I would definitely correct her, something like , no silly, I'm not mommy, I'm xxxxxx. Can you say xxxxxx. She's confused.
sarahjoy
by New Member on Mar. 27, 2014 at 1:17 AM

Ya... shes very confused...she did it before and then the next time i was there i kept playin the who r u, who am i game...reminding her im sarah. Guess ill have to keep doing that lol. When my girls r there they referr to me as mommy like saying go ask mom for help. But i am their mom so thats what they call me so i think that is  confusing her. But my kids never call me sarah even when telling someone else to talk to me they always say mom. 

momof2ex1
by Ruby Member on Mar. 27, 2014 at 1:41 AM
3 moms liked this
If you were babysitting your neighbors kid, or your niece/nephew, what would the answer be? Would you correct them? Or would you think it's normal that they call you mommy because you spent some time with them while their parents were working?
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momof2ex1
by Ruby Member on Mar. 27, 2014 at 1:42 AM
Guess what? Kids are going to spend all of their lives being around people that call someone mom or dad. It's not that confusing.

Quoting sarahjoy:

Ya... shes very confused...she did it before and then the next time i was there i kept playin the who r u, who am i game...reminding her im sarah. Guess ill have to keep doing that lol. When my girls r there they referr to me as mommy like saying go ask mom for help. But i am their mom so thats what they call me so i think that is  confusing her. But my kids never call me sarah even when telling someone else to talk to me they always say mom. 

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RonansMommy02
by Member on Mar. 27, 2014 at 7:49 AM
remember when you were little and you accidently called your 1st grade teacher mom? its basically the same, it was a mistake. dss calls me mom sometimes i just pretend i disnt hear him and answer him once he calls me by my name
chasinrainbows
by Gold Member on Mar. 27, 2014 at 8:26 AM
You and your boyfriend should be correcting both kids. You aren't that little girl's mom and your boyfriend isn't your son's step-dad.
AmyB118
by NA Rocks on Mar. 27, 2014 at 8:33 AM
1 mom liked this
Ugh. Thanks for the awkward childhood memories. Lmao

Quoting RonansMommy02: remember when you were little and you accidently called your 1st grade teacher mom? its basically the same, it was a mistake. dss calls me mom sometimes i just pretend i disnt hear him and answer him once he calls me by my name
CampClan
by Bronze Member on Mar. 27, 2014 at 8:38 AM
I agree- correct her. If & when you & BF get married then talk to her about what she can & wants to call you. My BF's kids don't call me stepmom & mine don't call him stepdad (although my 4yo keeps telling me he wants a stepdad even though I doubt he know what a stepdad is). But we have only been together for 3 months.

As for your DS calling BF stepped- how long have you been together? I figure not too long since his DD is 3. But I would never tell my kids to call their dad's GF "Stepmom" unless they had been together for several years. And infact do refer to her as their SM because they have been together for 5 yrs. And I doubt they will ever get married. And I'm okay with it!
YNot4ever
by Member on Mar. 27, 2014 at 8:51 AM

SS slips up every now and then, but I have also been called grandma.  We have realized it seems to be more frequent when he is tired.  He is also 8, and isn't confused.  I think it is more out of habit, meaning when he is tired usually mom or grandma comforts him.  We usually just giggle it off and I call him some random name, typically it is one of the pet's names.  He finds it hilarious and all is well.  

I would correct her.  If mom is ever present when it happens, well that will cause a lot of hurt feelings (rightfully so) and be all kinds of awkward.  

minimoo
by Gold Member on Mar. 27, 2014 at 9:00 AM
Ydd has been calling me Mrs. Teacher's Name a lot this year. I just crack up.

Quoting AmyB118: Ugh. Thanks for the awkward childhood memories. Lmao

Quoting RonansMommy02: remember when you were little and you accidently called your 1st grade teacher mom? its basically the same, it was a mistake. dss calls me mom sometimes i just pretend i disnt hear him and answer him once he calls me by my name
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