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I think my head just might explode *rant* update2

Posted by on Apr. 2, 2014 at 10:46 PM
  • 14 Replies
We are at a stand still. Ex's baby niece passed away a few days after all of this so I am going to wait on doing anything. Regardless of my frustration in all of this please send positive thoughts towards his family. I cannot imagine the pain his sister must be in right now.

Attorney got back to us today and said we needed to bring him a birth certificate and print out both his criminal history from public record and child support history. Which... he finally started getting garnished in February after having ran from it since ds was 2 when the judge finally started it up. I am now feeling like I have gone into fight mode. Whether he is bluffing or not he is not going to know what hit him when I'm finished. Please tell me if I am over reacting or wrong for feeling the need to blow him apart in court.

It is also now Friday and I have not heard anything back from him about the counseling with Z either. That just occurred to me as I was typing this update. I'm not shocked at all with him at this point.

We have been going through ALOT lately. I was driving an hour to and an hour from my mom's four days a week to care for her while she had cancer. She passed 3 weeks ago. We have been hit repetitively with stupid family drama crap since which I can deal with. Just one step at a time.
I offered ex a chance to very slowly come back around to see ds here supervised. Spoke to the counselor and she said she thinks this is okay.
Anyway.... X ridiculous amount of time, AFTER HE OPTED NOT TO, later I get a text from ex stating "r u gonna let me see Z or not?".
Really? He knew the answer to that question. I told him he could come here and he said " No thanks. We will handle this another way".
Anyway so we texted back and forth a few times and I told him I spoke to z's counselor and she suggested he come into the picture going to counseling with him. He is as of right now unsure and will "get back to me".
Apparently he was informed that he is not to come here to see Z.
I am going to talk with our attorney tomorrow and get prepared. I know he doesn't have a leg to stand on with his history however every one of his girlfriend's ex and current will put on a show. He is a really skilled pathological liar. So who knows. I am still putting myself back together from my mom passing. The last thing I want to deal with is my psycho ex and his girlfriend's attorney.

If this doesn't make sense I apologize. Just exhausted and not thinking straight for the moment.
by on Apr. 2, 2014 at 10:46 PM
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Replies (1-10):
FroYoBitch
by on Apr. 2, 2014 at 11:34 PM
1 mom liked this
It makes sense.
I am sorry for your loss.
Was x court ordered that he can not see your child unsupervised? If so, I would not communicate with him regarding this...let him go through your attorney and/or counselor. You don't need that added stress of his bullshit right now. If he is sincere he will do what he has to do.
Best of luck.
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whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 7:45 AM
2 moms liked this

I'm sorry about your mom.

Don't worry about him taking you to court. If he does, he does. You will cross that bridge when you get to it. As you say, he doesn't have a leg to stand on. Just don't worry about it till there is something concrete to deal with.

whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 8:28 AM

and another thing. He has a lot of nerve making a threat like that to you.  He has nothing but empty threats. Ignore him. You have the upper hand -- you know it and he knows it.

Quoting Rachael-Dawn: he said " No thanks. We will handle this another way".


Rachael-Dawn
by Bronze Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 8:34 AM
Thanks for the support. I know you're right. I will keep updated as I can. I'm finally pretty calm this morning.

Quoting whatIknownow:

and another thing. He has a lot of nerve making a threat like that to you.  He has nothing but empty threats. Ignore him. You have the upper hand -- you know it and he knows it.

Quoting Rachael-Dawn: he said " No thanks. We will handle this another way".

Singlemama52
by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 8:35 AM
I'm so sorry about your mom. Do not let his threats scare you. I'm sorry he's putting you through this!
Rachael-Dawn
by Bronze Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 8:42 AM
No. When I told him to go on he did without a fight because he knew he had no way to legally put up a fight. He had done to much. I think I opened this can of worms trying mentioning him working to be a normal part of his life again under supervision for a while. He's FINALLY being garnished for child support so I do know that he has rights. However he knows that I know he is still dealing drugs so I'm not sure how far he thinks he can push this. I know he got pretty ticked off last night when I told him what the counselor suggested. I will keep updated as I know what is going on. Will still be speaking to my attorney today. I am pretty calm this morning. Going to take this one step at a time.

Quoting FroYoBitch: It makes sense.
I am sorry for your loss.
Was x court ordered that he can not see your child unsupervised? If so, I would not communicate with him regarding this...let him go through your attorney and/or counselor. You don't need that added stress of his bullshit right now. If he is sincere he will do what he has to do.
Best of luck.
tiafez
by Silver Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 9:21 AM
1 mom liked this

I think you handled it great and I agree, letting your atty. take over now is best. Your ex can blather all he wants but he's got nothing when it comes to court. I'd ask your atty to suggest supervised, taking that pressure off of you suggesting it. Give your atty. the info/permission to speak with the counselor. And please give yourself some down time to deal with all the sadness you've been through. I'm so sorry about your Mom.

wise.toes
by Silver Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 9:38 AM
1 mom liked this

i would think supervised visits through an agency would be a much better solution than him being in your home.

that said, i'm so sorry for your loss. i just lost my dad 4 weeks ago, i know how tough it is. it seems everything is falling apart all at once and in every direction. (hugs) 

Rachael-Dawn
by Bronze Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 9:49 AM
I am so sorry. *hugs back*
That's exactly what it feels like.
I spoke to her literally every day 2 to 3 times a day sometimes. She was quite literally my BEST friend. We got 7 years of the best relationship we ever had. Had a schedule. Every morning at 9 am. Earlier if I had appointments.

I agree with the visitation through am agency. I just found out he has another assault charge from February. Usually it's against a female and they drop it so the court dismisses it. This one stuck. Just backs up my concern that he is still as volatile as he was before.
With everything said last night and a ss my sister took of her Fb (he's on hers. I blocked him from mine) when I told her what happened... I'm not worried at this point. That assault charge sticking just gave me all the peace I needed. I wish it didn't have to be this way. I wish he would just grow up and stop everything.
As angry as it makes me, it breaks my heart more I think in terms of my son not being able to have a real relationship with him. He has an AMAZING relationship with his stepdad (dh has been a good dad to him since he was a year old). It's just not the same though. I know that.


Quoting wise.toes:

i would think supervised visits through an agency would be a much better solution than him being in your home.

that said, i'm so sorry for your loss. i just lost my dad 4 weeks ago, i know how tough it is. it seems everything is falling apart all at once and in every direction. (hugs) 

AmericanDream
by Gold Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 10:16 AM

 I am so terribly sorry for your loss.  I hope that you can find comfort and healing.

As far as your ex?  If he takes you to court then you takes you to court.  There's nothing you can do to stop him from showing his ass, so let him.  I think it was very nice that you offered to allow him to see his son and he's a moron for turning that down.

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