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I think mom is making them do this!

Posted by on Apr. 8, 2014 at 9:58 AM
  • 84 Replies
How can you tell if a child is being brain washed or is it even possible??
by on Apr. 8, 2014 at 9:58 AM
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Replies (1-10):
ladybugchick317
by Charity on Apr. 8, 2014 at 10:10 AM

 Start documenting things and notating if it is after they have seen her.

whatIknownow
by Emerald Member on Apr. 8, 2014 at 10:11 AM
1 mom liked this

Need more information.

What do you think Mom is "making them do?"

WifeyC
by Platinum Member on Apr. 8, 2014 at 10:14 AM

What did they do?

savingtheworld
by Bronze Member on Apr. 8, 2014 at 10:27 AM
What ever they want! And letting them make decisions that are not age appropriate. . And really it was just a question, what are the signs?

Quoting WifeyC:

What did they do?

annabl1970
by Gold Member on Apr. 8, 2014 at 10:31 AM
5 moms liked this
When a child start using words/definitions/arguments too mature for his/her age, when a child repeating exact sentences which Ex uses in arguments, when a parent shares with child about divorce, court, child support in details, esspesially when these details make other parent look as abuser, when child told lies about other parent, when a child put in position - he/she has to choose between parents, when a child afraid to show his/her love for other parent, when child makes up lies about OP to make the brainwashing parent happy, and etc
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GloBug62
by Bronze Member on Apr. 8, 2014 at 10:39 AM

This is exactly what SS would do. He would repeat stuff that BM would tell him as if it was his argument or own feelings, only it was stuff that no 7-8yo kid would even think of. He would tell DH that he hated him and thought he was evil. That DH stole him from his mom and wouldn't their family. All kinds of ridiculous shit. BM told SS that DH didn't love him, didn't want him and wanted her to get an abortion when she was pregnant (even though they were married and it was a planned pregnancy but whatever). She told him this when he was 9 yo. She has consistently tried to destroy the relationship between SS and DH for the last 5 years. It hasn't worked. It was pretty rough for the first 3 years, but SS came around. He started noticing that BM lied to him a lot about other stuff too. Now when she talks about DH, he pretty much just ignores her.

Quoting annabl1970: When a child start using words/definitions/arguments too mature for his/her age, when a child repeating exact sentences which Ex uses in arguments, when a parent shares with child about divorce, court, child support in details, esspesially when these details make other parent look as abuser, when child told lies about other parent, when a child put in position - he/she has to choose between parents, when a child afraid to show his/her love for other parent, when child makes up lies about OP to make the brainwashing parent happy, and etc

 

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.  

savingtheworld
by Bronze Member on Apr. 8, 2014 at 10:41 AM
Yeah usually. . What ever the argument mom has, the kids will come back and say they are upset with it to? Like changing visitations, mom has a problem with it the kids were fine now they are saying they want it changed to? But they don't have a reason? It's just because! It's always like that what ever mom has a problem with, suddenly the kids do as well? I'm just wondering because I think it's more then the kids being preteens

Quoting ladybugchick317:

 Start documenting things and notating if it is after they have seen her.

savingtheworld
by Bronze Member on Apr. 8, 2014 at 10:42 AM
At what age do they realize??

Quoting GloBug62:


This is exactly what SS would do. He would repeat stuff that BM would tell him as if it was his argument or own feelings, only it was stuff that no 7-8yo kid would even think of. He would tell DH that he hated him and thought he was evil. That DH stole him from his mom and wouldn't their family. All kinds of ridiculous shit. BM told SS that DH didn't love him, didn't want him and wanted her to get an abortion when she was pregnant (even though they were married and it was a planned pregnancy but whatever). She told him this when he was 9 yo. She has consistently tried to destroy the relationship between SS and DH for the last 5 years. It hasn't worked. It was pretty rough for the first 3 years, but SS came around. He started noticing that BM lied to him a lot about other stuff too. Now when she talks about DH, he pretty much just ignores her.


Quoting annabl1970: When a child start using words/definitions/arguments too mature for his/her age, when a child repeating exact sentences which Ex uses in arguments, when a parent shares with child about divorce, court, child support in details, esspesially when these details make other parent look as abuser, when child told lies about other parent, when a child put in position - he/she has to choose between parents, when a child afraid to show his/her love for other parent, when child makes up lies about OP to make the brainwashing parent happy, and etc

 

annabl1970
by Gold Member on Apr. 8, 2014 at 10:45 AM
2 moms liked this
Yep kids are not stupid, and most of the time brainwashing fires back against the parent who does it.

Quoting GloBug62:


This is exactly what SS would do. He would repeat stuff that BM would tell him as if it was his argument or own feelings, only it was stuff that no 7-8yo kid would even think of. He would tell DH that he hated him and thought he was evil. That DH stole him from his mom and wouldn't their family. All kinds of ridiculous shit. BM told SS that DH didn't love him, didn't want him and wanted her to get an abortion when she was pregnant (even though they were married and it was a planned pregnancy but whatever). She told him this when he was 9 yo. She has consistently tried to destroy the relationship between SS and DH for the last 5 years. It hasn't worked. It was pretty rough for the first 3 years, but SS came around. He started noticing that BM lied to him a lot about other stuff too. Now when she talks about DH, he pretty much just ignores her.


Quoting annabl1970: When a child start using words/definitions/arguments too mature for his/her age, when a child repeating exact sentences which Ex uses in arguments, when a parent shares with child about divorce, court, child support in details, esspesially when these details make other parent look as abuser, when child told lies about other parent, when a child put in position - he/she has to choose between parents, when a child afraid to show his/her love for other parent, when child makes up lies about OP to make the brainwashing parent happy, and etc

 

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ladybugchick317
by Charity on Apr. 8, 2014 at 10:45 AM

 Talk to your atty. See if there is a way to put in the CO that there are to be no conversations with the kids about things discussed with her and dh. Then if she does it then she can be held in contempt. Also, see if maybe there is someone that is out of the situation that can talk to the kids to find out why they are agreeing with bm when they don't have a reason and help the kids understand that you want what is best for them but that if they make a decision that they need to know and understand why they are making that decision.

Quoting savingtheworld: Yeah usually. . What ever the argument mom has, the kids will come back and say they are upset with it to? Like changing visitations, mom has a problem with it the kids were fine now they are saying they want it changed to? But they don't have a reason? It's just because! It's always like that what ever mom has a problem with, suddenly the kids do as well? I'm just wondering because I think it's more then the kids being preteens
Quoting ladybugchick317:

 Start documenting things and notating if it is after they have seen her.

 

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