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Custody - how long? (update)

Posted by on Apr. 15, 2014 at 6:48 PM
  • 74 Replies

For those who had to fight, long did your custody 'battle' process take? From filing to judges decision. Dh is in the little of one. FC did an investigation to give recommendations to BPs. He met with the investigator two months ago, is awaiting a reply and is getting antsy.

Thanks!

 

**UPDATE**  5/9/14

DH is still waiting for FC recommendations on custody.  Then the court will set a trial date.  It has now been three months since DH and BM met with the FC investigator.  And 5 since he filed.  SS5 met with investigator the week (or two ish) after they did, so that part is done too.  Bm has made five false reports regarding abuse (all unfounded) and has failed a drug test.  Dh's lawyer followed up around the third week of April.  Investigator said her report would be completed by the end of April....

But Dh dropped off another false CPS report (made by BM) and documentation regarding a unrelated arrest warrant active for BM (in another county for harassing her boyfriends work place - 28 calls in a 6 hour period - his boss called police three or four different days).  Dh has been working with a detective on harssment and (possible) false report charges against BM.  Dh thinks that's what slowed down the process.  Hoping to hear something soon. 

SS5 has been saying that BM acts 'crazy' (he said she yells allot on the phone and gave some other examples), his been praying that she 'gets help' (Dh asked why he says that and ss said 'she says you need help but I don't think so'), and saying he doesn't want to go back there.  .... it's hard. His lawyer said all we can do is wait. Its a stressful waiting process.

Oh and, we started looking into counseling for ss5.  And Dh will have him start that as soon as custody is done.

Thanks for those who have read.. needed to vent.

by on Apr. 15, 2014 at 6:48 PM
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Replies (1-10):
jules2boys
by Gold Member on Apr. 15, 2014 at 6:57 PM

No idea. Sorry.  Maybe he can call and get either an update OR ask how long the process normally takes?  They could either be backed up in the investigators office OR he could find out it usually takes 6 months (!) OR it could have slipped through the cracks and if he didn't/doesn't call they won't find the case again until they do an internal audit OR they could be waiting on evaluations from others OR... well, there could be any number of reasons for the wait.  But, if it were me, I'd call and at least find out how long these things normally take and go from there. 

mrsd2013
by Silver Member on Apr. 15, 2014 at 7:03 PM
Two months ago the investigator said it would take 30 days and there were 10 cases ahead of his. His lawyer spoke to the investigator two weeks ago. She hadn't started on his case yet but would be soon. He does want to be pushy. And she probably got stuck on another case. aahhhh... court stuff just takes forever.

Just wondering how others experiences were. Thanks. :)


Quoting jules2boys:

No idea. Sorry.  Maybe he can call and get either an update OR ask how long the process normally takes?  They could either be backed up in the investigators office OR he could find out it usually takes 6 months (!) OR it could have slipped through the cracks and if he didn't/doesn't call they won't find the case again until they do an internal audit OR they could be waiting on evaluations from others OR... well, there could be any number of reasons for the wait.  But, if it were me, I'd call and at least find out how long these things normally take and go from there. 

mb1111
by on Apr. 15, 2014 at 7:04 PM

BM filed at the end of October.  Judge made decision the middle of the following august.

mrsd2013
by Silver Member on Apr. 15, 2014 at 7:07 PM
Wow that's a long time! I had alway assumed 6 months but maybe longer if they are all like ours. Were there problems that occurred to make it take longer then usual?

Quoting mb1111:

BM filed at the end of October.  Judge made decision the middle of the following august.

soonergirl980
by Gold Member on Apr. 15, 2014 at 7:09 PM

Between me and my ex it lasted about 9 months 1 year and about 7 months if you include paternity and cs cases as well

faerie75
by Platinum Member on Apr. 15, 2014 at 7:09 PM
SO and BM lasted 14 months then settled after all that (crooked GAL)
mrsd2013
by Silver Member on Apr. 15, 2014 at 7:14 PM
I've read other posts of yours about the GAL. Seems it was messy. so far everyone involved seems to be supporting DH. We feel pretty confident but you never know. I'm just looking forward to moving forward with our lives.

Quoting faerie75: SO and BM lasted 14 months then settled after all that (crooked GAL)
jules2boys
by Gold Member on Apr. 15, 2014 at 7:15 PM

I would suspect it would also depend on where you live.  I'm in the greater Los Angeles area.  Things take a LONG time here. Family court and other legal court issues, everything takes a LONG time here because, well, there are so many people here. 

I have family in Montana.  There are more people in my county than there are in the entire STATE of Montana I think.  ;)  Anyway, I'd think that getting things through the courts there would take much LESS time because they don't have the same issues our courts here have and a LOT fewer people, thus fewer cases going on.  kwim? 

Maybe you can google your city, county, district, parish (whatever you have there) and see what pops up.  You may find that even though the investigator said 30 days, that is just standard for what they say but the average is really more like what MB, Sooner and Faerie have shared.  :( 

cottonsandy
by on Apr. 15, 2014 at 7:19 PM
It depends in the urgency of the case. It usually will take 30 days or more. If bp don't come up with an agreement, it will go to trial. Ours was an emergency case, BM took the children for visitation and refused to return them and it took a week to get kids back in our care and a month later for investigation and mediation. Also depends in your lawyer too. Our lawyer was a hustler lol he was in top of it and wanted a speedy trial. Also you may have two trials we had one for custody and one for child support.
mb1111
by on Apr. 15, 2014 at 7:19 PM

One thing was it just took forever for the court to o give a court date.  File date was end of Oct and first court date wasn't until May.  Second thing was that BMs attorney was disorganized and spacey.  They ended up having to make three trips to court because she couldn't get all her arguments in during the first trip which had 4 hours set aside.  They spent a total of 11 hours in court.  Only about 2 of that was used by my DHs attorney to give his arguments.  It really was ridiculous.  I hope BM doesn't use that attorney any more. 

Quoting mrsd2013: Wow that's a long time! I had alway assumed 6 months but maybe longer if they are all like ours. Were there problems that occurred to make it take longer then usual?
Quoting mb1111:

BM filed at the end of October.  Judge made decision the middle of the following august.


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