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Friends with your husband's ex wife

Posted by on May. 6, 2014 at 10:32 AM
  • 47 Replies

 So, this is my story

I have an ex husband, and I am friends with his wife. they have 2 kids and they call me mama tt ,  Now that I am a step mom, I want to be friends with my new husbands ex wife, she added me to facebook, I wrote her a note, explaining that I know how she is feeling, and I thought every thing was ok, but now she has deleted me from facebook. Personally i think we should try to be friends,. am i wrong thinking that? Now i am concerned that she will turn the kids against me...

by on May. 6, 2014 at 10:32 AM
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Replies (1-10):
cdrainey3
by Cher on May. 6, 2014 at 10:35 AM
2 moms liked this
I don't think there's anything wrong with trying, but I think it's a slow process. Still be nice to her even though she deleted you. She might just need more time or think its weird. Being nice is the best medicine.
CrunchMaMaBear
by Queen Crunch on May. 6, 2014 at 10:37 AM
3 moms liked this
Not everyone wants to be friends with their EXs new wife. Dont take it personally, she might just not feel comfortable with you. Respect her feelings and back off the friendship road. Focus on your marriage
100problems-1
by Member on May. 6, 2014 at 10:39 AM
Good luck with that.
Bertieb
by Bronze Member on May. 6, 2014 at 10:55 AM
1 mom liked this

I can't imagine being FB friends with his ex and we are not adversaries. I just don't buy into the "lets all be friends" one big family now. An ex is an ex, and I just don't understand a friendship with someone that slept with your husband and has a personal history with him. Besides, my DH would freak. He'd always wonder what we were talking about regarding him.

ladybugchick317
by on May. 6, 2014 at 11:00 AM
1 mom liked this

 While I think that it is great that you have a good relationship with your kids step mom you need to remember that not all bm's are as willing as you. Just keep that in mind and let her make the next move. Good luck.

pdxmum
by Ruby Member on May. 6, 2014 at 11:01 AM

How was your divorce?  How soon did he remarry?  Did you have kids together?  How long did it take.

now answer these questions for your DH.

Too many variables to dictate that what you think is correct is correct for her.

heck, I was sort of friends with BM before I even started dating DH and SM was OW.  I am now, 5 and 8 years in, I avoid BM at all costs and am friends of a sort with SM.

leegirl_jm
by Ruby Member on May. 6, 2014 at 11:06 AM

The note sounded like it was a bit much, I personally would have been turned off with you saying 'you know how I feel'.

Tinkerbellmama
by Platinum Member on May. 6, 2014 at 11:29 AM

Nope. I have ZERO desire to be friends with BM, and I highly doubt that if my kids had a SM I could be friends with her.

BM is not a person that I would seek out as a friend had her and I met under different circumstances.

WifeyC
by Platinum Member on May. 6, 2014 at 11:30 AM

What makes you think she will turn the kids against you?

theresatt
by on May. 6, 2014 at 11:39 AM

I think be socailable to the ex is kinda important, but apparently that is just me...  oh well

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