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SD Quincenra

Posted by on May. 14, 2014 at 4:07 PM
  • 77 Replies
My SD BM called my DH husband today to tell him Im not welcome at their daughters quincenra. She said she it would be uncomfortable for me to be there. This kind of maes me mad because her kids are at my house before and after school everyday, thats ok... Its just frusterating and annyoing and Im just venting over the situation.
by on May. 14, 2014 at 4:07 PM
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Replies (1-10):
XXanonymousXX
by Silver Member on May. 14, 2014 at 4:17 PM
Is BM married or in a relationship?
jules2boys
by Gold Member on May. 14, 2014 at 4:19 PM

How long have DH and BM been separated/divorced?  How long have you been with/married to DH?

Any history of issues when you and BM are in the same location?  Have you been there for other events for the kids? 

kandacer_6
by Member on May. 14, 2014 at 4:22 PM
She has a boyfriend. They dont love together but the kids know him. Idk how serious or if they are even still together.

Quoting XXanonymousXX: Is BM married or in a relationship?
kandacer_6
by Member on May. 14, 2014 at 4:27 PM
They have been seperated for 10 years. We have been married for almost 6. BM refuses to be in the same location as me. We do everything for the kods separate, birthdays holidays etc... if we go to sporting events or concerts together she stays far away acting like she doesnt know us. We have a LOT of problems with her. She badmouths me and my kids to my SK and makes the kids feel guilty for trying to like us.


Quoting jules2boys:

How long have DH and BM been separated/divorced?  How long have you been with/married to DH?

Any history of issues when you and BM are in the same location?  Have you been there for other events for the kids? 

jules2boys
by Gold Member on May. 14, 2014 at 4:31 PM
5 moms liked this

Ok, who's paying for the party then?  If your DH is paying, or contributing, then BM needs to get over herself, surround herself with her family and friends who'll be joining in the party, and you stay out of their 'space' during the event.  :)  For any I've heard of (haven't been to one since I was a teen myself), there are plenty of people there and quite often the complaint is, the parents didn't get to see/visit with everyone they invited.  Surely you and BM could avoid each other... :)

XXanonymousXX
by Silver Member on May. 14, 2014 at 4:33 PM
5 moms liked this
I think that if the boyfriend is welcome to attend, if DH's family is welcome to attend, and/or if DH is paying for part of the party BM's request is out of line. It may very well be uncomfortable if you are there. But uncomfortable is sometimes part of life, she's gotta learn to deal like an adult.

Quoting kandacer_6: She has a boyfriend. They dont love together but the kids know him. Idk how serious or if they are even still together.

Quoting XXanonymousXX: Is BM married or in a relationship?
SnapIt
by Bronze Member on May. 14, 2014 at 4:39 PM
2 moms liked this
Whaat??
She need to grow up already
What a waste of time and energy shes spending

Life goes on
Relationships fail
People remarry and move along

Your married to him, youre not a bar fly he just picked up
It her issue and she needs to get over it
The party is not about her happiness, its about the daughters happiness.
Such drama


Quoting kandacer_6: They have been seperated for 10 years. We have been married for almost 6. BM refuses to be in the same location as me. We do everything for the kods separate, birthdays holidays etc... if we go to sporting events or concerts together she stays far away acting like she doesnt know us. We have a LOT of problems with her. She badmouths me and my kids to my SK and makes the kids feel guilty for trying to like us.


Quoting jules2boys:

How long have DH and BM been separated/divorced?  How long have you been with/married to DH?

Any history of issues when you and BM are in the same location?  Have you been there for other events for the kids? 

SnapIt
by Bronze Member on May. 14, 2014 at 4:40 PM
1 mom liked this
And of hes paying for part of that party for his daughter
He gets to invite who he wants
Even of its the bum on the corner
jules2boys
by Gold Member on May. 14, 2014 at 4:58 PM
1 mom liked this

I'd have issues if BF said 'ok' to you not attending after you've been married this long (you're not 'new' on the scene) AND he's paying for part of this.  That's not right. 

(if it helps any, I'm a BM only, I'm not a SM, my boys have a SM though)

I have a cousin who celebrated hers last year.  She's adopted.  My aunts who adopted her invited some of her bio family to the event as well.  This only seemed right. 

BM "should" be so busy that day she shouldn't have time to notice if you're there or not, but you should be there.  I'd take this one up with BF.  This isn't right, IMO. 

But, I can see your point if you being there could cause more drama for your SD.  :( 

Quoting kandacer_6: I agree. Hes paying his part and his Moms making herextravagant dres. However he told her he didnt agree and it put him in an akward spot but OK. So I dont know what to even think of this. It make cause so much drama for her to tell her that...


SnapIt
by Bronze Member on May. 14, 2014 at 4:58 PM
He shouldnt be placed in a awkward spot, he should be placing her in her own awkward place.

Such nonsence
Like a spoiled kid
Dont adults see how childish they look?


Quoting kandacer_6: I agree. Hes paying his part and his Moms making herextravagant dres. However he told her he didnt agree and it put him in an akward spot but OK. So I dont know what to even think of this. It make cause so much drama for her to tell her that...
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