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Possible abuse, wwyd??

Posted by on Jun. 4, 2014 at 2:49 PM
  • 32 Replies
SD7 and SS5. We have full custody, but BM has visitions. She is supposed to get them every other weekend. It just started a year ago. before that she didnt want them to come over. It started off okay, but slowed down. she cancelled alot. The last time they were over there, they came home saying that they were left home alone with BMs new husband. (WHICH isnt supposed to happen due to him having a violent history) My SS had bruises on his back, on his rib cage and under his armpit. He always had scratches all over. both his story and his sisters story..."He threw a temper tantrum and got yelled at. He got scared because the new husband was yelling at him so he started crying. the husband then grabbed him up, carried him upstairs and threw him down and locked him in the room."

NOW. we brought both kids in different rooms and they told the same story. My SS told me that "mommy kept saying it was an accident." My DH called BM and she said she was there the whole time and the kids are lying. That SS got the marks because they were play fighting. We called CPS and they went and spoke with my SS, took pictures and spoke with BM and her husband. They said they opened an investigation but that was the last thing we heard. a few days later we get a call froma detective, BM called the cops claiming that my DH is threatening to kill her.

These kids are my life, I know they love their mom and miss her...and I want them to see her....but I also dont want them being around a guy who is possibly hurting them. What would YOU do?
by on Jun. 4, 2014 at 2:49 PM
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Replies (1-10):
TheQueenOfChaos
by Member on Jun. 4, 2014 at 2:52 PM
1 mom liked this
File an emergency petition with the courts for supervised visitation. I would also inform the police of the open CPS investigation against her and her DH/BF for child abuse and tell them this is retaliation. Contact a lawyer about what you should do until the court date, if you should withhold them from visits.

It's great that you care about their feelings for mom, but kids are natural pleasers. They WANT to be loved. It would take a lot for them to request not to go back to her home, so this is where you and DH step in and make the decision that's best for them, which is keeping them away from BM and her spouse. If she truly cared, she wouldn't be making excuses for his actions. He's more important to her than they are.
Birdseed
by Platinum Member on Jun. 4, 2014 at 2:53 PM

I'm confused.  Did CPS investigate or not?  Has your DH followed up?  And what is the status with the detective?

I think your DH needs to follow up with CPS if he hasn't already and see what they recommend.

sunshinelolipop
by on Jun. 4, 2014 at 2:57 PM
they said they opened an investigation and theyd get back to us. weve called several times and have yet to get a call back. even have gone down to the office and ended up waiting for over an hour before just going home.

Quoting Birdseed:

I'm confused.  Did CPS investigate or not?  Has your DH followed up?  And what is the status with the detective?

I think your DH needs to follow up with CPS if he hasn't already and see what they recommend.

FroYoBitch
by on Jun. 4, 2014 at 2:59 PM

 I would withhold visitation.

mrsd2013
by Silver Member on Jun. 4, 2014 at 2:59 PM

You/your Dh took the first step by calling CPS. They have 30 days (in my state) to investigate. You should contact a laywer and ask about emergancy order to suspense perenting time with BM.

If the claims are found to be true, CPS will most likely not allow visitation with BMs DH present.

mrsd2013
by Silver Member on Jun. 4, 2014 at 3:00 PM

 Without a court order to do so OPs DH could be in contempt for withholding.

Quoting FroYoBitch:

 I would withhold visitation.

 

Singlemama52
by on Jun. 4, 2014 at 3:02 PM
If it was urgent, CPS would have removed the children and contacted the father I would think, but if they already closed the case you should get a letter within 30 days, or they should.
mrsd2013
by Silver Member on Jun. 4, 2014 at 3:03 PM

 Ops DH has custody so CPS wouldn't remove. 

Quoting Singlemama52: If it was urgent, CPS would have removed the children and contacted the father I would think, but if they already closed the case you should get a letter within 30 days, or they should.

 

Singlemama52
by on Jun. 4, 2014 at 3:04 PM
Oops, misread it.

Quoting mrsd2013:

 Ops DH has custody so CPS wouldn't remove. 


Quoting Singlemama52: If it was urgent, CPS would have removed the children and contacted the father I would think, but if they already closed the case you should get a letter within 30 days, or they should.

 

FroYoBitch
by on Jun. 4, 2014 at 3:12 PM

 

Quoting mrsd2013:

 Without a court order to do so OPs DH could be in contempt for withholding.

Quoting FroYoBitch:

 I would withhold visitation.

 

 Given the circumstances and seemingly accurate evidence - I would NOT allow my child to go back to that home - possible contempt charges or not.

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