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Trouble Trouble

Posted by on Jun. 18, 2014 at 3:05 PM
  • 48 Replies
Have you ever been in a situation where a child's real mother is always trying to be in the picture with your family and she is starting a lot of trouble trying to be so involved?
by on Jun. 18, 2014 at 3:05 PM
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Replies (1-10):
venessaw04
by Bronze Member on Jun. 18, 2014 at 3:06 PM

more detalis please

progressandjoy
by Silver Member on Jun. 18, 2014 at 3:15 PM
What do you mean 'your family'?

Like trying to be involved with her children, her ex in-laws, or SM's family?
faerie75
by Platinum Member on Jun. 18, 2014 at 3:18 PM

 no because SO sets boundaries.

jules2boys
by Gold Member on Jun. 18, 2014 at 3:23 PM

yes, this please.

Quoting venessaw04:

more detalis please


Tinkerbellmama
by Platinum Member on Jun. 18, 2014 at 3:32 PM
2 moms liked this

BM tried to force herself into attendance at my wedding.

BM then tried to get an invite to my baby shower with DS.

BM then tried to physically force herself into the delivery room not even 10 minutes after DS was born.

So yea, I have experience with this. However, I didn't deal with it. DH did.

*I* don't have a baby with BM, therefore that is HIS mess to deal with and set boundaries. (Although, I admit that when BM tried to force her way into my delivery room several not so nice things flew out of my mouth and I'm sure that had something to do with BM changing her behavior, along with DH establishing boundaries and forcing them to hold). 

Lauren79
by on Jun. 18, 2014 at 3:35 PM

My initial reaction to this without further details is this.....

You said "a child's real mother", why wouldn't they be involved in THIER child's life? While you and your DH and his kids/your kids are yes a family unit YOU are not his child's mother and just because he married you it doesn't cancel her out as this child's mother and make you magically said child's mom!

If you couldn't handle the fact that he had children from a previous relationship then why did you marry him?

Sweet_Cheeka
by on Jun. 18, 2014 at 3:49 PM
This is a random question ..This is not about me!

Quoting Lauren79:

My initial reaction to this without further details is this.....


You said "a child's real mother", why wouldn't they be involved in THIER child's life? While you and your DH and his kids/your kids are yes a family unit YOU are not his child's mother and just because he married you it doesn't cancel her out as this child's mother and make you magically said child's mom!


If you couldn't handle the fact that he had children from a previous relationship then why did you marry him?

Lauren79
by on Jun. 18, 2014 at 3:51 PM

Well like I said, my initial reaction without further details....

So then it would be a general YOU 

Quoting Sweet_Cheeka: This is a random question ..This is not about me!
Quoting Lauren79:

My initial reaction to this without further details is this.....

You said "a child's real mother", why wouldn't they be involved in THIER child's life? While you and your DH and his kids/your kids are yes a family unit YOU are not his child's mother and just because he married you it doesn't cancel her out as this child's mother and make you magically said child's mom!

If you couldn't handle the fact that he had children from a previous relationship then why did you marry him?

 

RobsPrincess24
by ThePrincess on Jun. 18, 2014 at 4:04 PM

Nope. We are long distance though so I'm sure that has something to do with it.

MamaBear131716
by Bronze Member on Jun. 18, 2014 at 4:35 PM
The only issue like that is BM plans things during dh's time. School events and sports can't really be helped but every weekend there is something already planned. Birthday parties, dr's appts, anniversary parties, dances, camps, visiting relatives...etc. There has not been one weekend in months or a single day this summer that there wasn't already something planned that falls under one of those categories. Add in the already established baseball and football practices....there is little downtime or time to plan our own activities. I feel like BM basically hands us an itinerary when we get them that we have to follow. It does make it feel a bit like she controls our household when they are here if that makes sense.
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