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What would you tell this Mom? or What did SM do wrong?

Posted by on Jul. 5, 2014 at 1:03 PM
  • 79 Replies
1 mom liked this

A Mom wrote this in MC.....

DS came home from Ex and SMs house a few days ago and this has been bothering me.

I asked DS what he did he said one day while dad was at work SM took him to her hometown (about an hour away from their house) and he played with his cousins. I thought he meant they met up w his cousins on his dads side. But he told me they met up with SMs sister who he called his aunt, and she has a daughter he plays with. He then told me they went to lunch with grandma and great grandma... how do I explain to him they aren't his family?!

I sent an email to SM to let her know that if she continues to cross this line w me that we will be going to court. I want her and her family our of my sons life!
I have told my ex that they are not family and he shouldnt be calling them such because when him and SM split up that "family" will no longer be there. They are not his family and thos bounderies just need to be respected!!!

Career Woman, Wife and Mother of Two Children, a Girl and a Boy.

by on Jul. 5, 2014 at 1:03 PM
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by on Jul. 5, 2014 at 1:12 PM
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Wow... I hope BM in my sitch doesn't think that way. I have a good amount of neices and a nephew (soon to be two nephews) and most of them are around my SD's age. That lady needs to chill out and sounds insecure. I'm sure the judge would wonder wth her problem is if she took them to court over seeing SM's family. I feel bad for dad and SM in that situation.

by Ruby Member on Jul. 5, 2014 at 1:18 PM
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Hopefully her ex can just shut her down.  

by Ruby Member on Jul. 5, 2014 at 1:23 PM
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I would tell the mom to let this go. There are few things you can control and this is not one of them. Other than traveling an hour (not even a huge distance in my book given the metroplex I live in) I can't see what SM did at all as overstepping. I think mom is worried about the wrong things in life. This isn't a hill I would choose to die on.
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by Bronze Member on Jul. 5, 2014 at 1:24 PM
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Wow! That mom is seriously angry. I take my stepson to my family all the time. Sometimes with his dad, sometimes without. That just hurts the kids when parents act so petty. This woman sounds very jealous and selfish.
by on Jul. 5, 2014 at 1:28 PM
I don't see where the issue is.

My Kid adapted her sm family as her own, why wouldn't.she?

Just like my family as their own family.
by on Jul. 5, 2014 at 1:28 PM
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She sounds like my husbands ex wife. Hubby and I have been together since December 2004 and I am still refeered to as his whore and anyday now hes going to leave me lmao I think Bm who act like this are still not over their Exhusbands but thats my opinion. Lady needs to stfu and calm the heck down.

by Bronze Member on Jul. 5, 2014 at 1:30 PM
My husbands ex tried to pull that crap the first couple times sd spent time with my side of the family. He told her to can it bc my family loved having sd over and were way more respectful and trustworthy than BM's friends (if you could call them that) ever were
by on Jul. 5, 2014 at 1:39 PM
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She way overstepped.

That a judge won't agree with her and if she doesn't stop with her alienating tactics that her Ex may take her to court, and likely would win since they are family - Aunts and cousins - by marriage. They aren't lying.

Also, seek counseling as you have some serious issues with regard to divorce and family that are going to permanently harm your child for a peaceful family.
by on Jul. 5, 2014 at 1:41 PM
3 moms liked this

It doesn't sound like the SM did anything wrong. Some BMs are control freaks and put their petty insecurities before the best interests of their children. Their hatred for the fathers encompasses everything else. 

BM won't even allow me to pick my SD up and I know she hates that SD adores my DD. Before DH and I got married she would often tell SD that I wasn't family. 

My SD has a younger 1/2 sister and BM won't allow SD any contact with anyone in that family. SD talks about how she misses them and it has been years since she has been around them. 

I get that BM is allowed to feel the way she wants , but BM can't control everything that happens on the fathers time. If the child was in danger , that is one thing, but getting upset that "non-family" love and accept her kid is just sick. 

I am also a BM, and my DDs father has never been involved. She is loved by lots who are not "blood". The way I saw it was if people wanted to love my child, the more the better! 

by Bronze Member on Jul. 5, 2014 at 2:09 PM
Thata just crazy to me.SM did nothing wrong and i would hope her DH, would let bm know things will not change.
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