Helping everyone adjust eta update (vent) from this evening
We are going through some major adjustment issues,which I get is probably very natural. My fiances 8 yr old daughter is constantly annoying everyone in a bid for constant attention. My 6 yr old dd has been very moody and bratty in general (usually a very sweet natured girl). My fiances 10 yr old ds who has adhd and anger issues has been acting out a ton and refusing to listen to me. The only ones who seem relatively unphased are my older 2, though they fight like cats and dogs but then they always have.
Im getting overwhelmed by all the chaos and fighting.i work full time days at a very demanding manufacturing job. My fiance works 60+ hrs a week. We are hurting for money because i just started working there a week ago and havent gotten a check yet so we have all been living off of his income. We are all very stressed and exhausted and its becoming too much for any of us.
What can I do to help make this transition easier on everyone?
ETA: im literally in tears tonight. It was a rough one. After dinner (which ny sks complained incessantly about) , my oldest daughter and I got up to start cleaning up and I asked the other kids to scrape their plates in the trash and bring them to me. My kids and my ss10 (surprisingly) did as they were asked without complaint. My sd8 just sat there and looked at me. I repeated my request. She said "I dont have to do that. It isnt my job". I said "In my house, we all clear our own plates. It makes doing the dishes much quicker." She smirked at me and said, " Well, good thing this isnt YOUR hoise its my daddys house" which started a huge fight between her and my 2 older kids who are very protective of me.
Finally, I got them all quieted down and under control. Sent sd to her room and finished cleaning up with the help of the other kids.
I played cards with them all afterwards and tried to engage. My sd even came out to join and we all tried to act like nothing had happened.
After the game, my oldest.pulled.me into my room for some one on one time to.discuss some issues shes been having with the boys while shes babysitting. My sd continually burst into my room.demanding my dd come into the living room with her now over and over and when I told her we would both be out in just a minute and my dd14 said "cant I spend 5 minutes alone with my mom?" she stomped her foot and snapped "You 2 dont NEED to be alone. You shouldnt have secrets from the rest of us!" Which started another big argument which ended in both girls storming off to their rooms, my dd6 crying because my sd slammed the bedroom door they share in her face and the boys angry because the noise was interrupting a tv show they were watching together nicely...for once.
I know its all.petty crap but I had a.rough day at work, Ive barely seen my fiance in a week because this week was our.opposite shifts week (hes on swing shift) and Im exhausted and stressed and emotionally completely drained. It doesnt help that my period is takung its sweet ass time thus month and I have horrible pms.
Ok. So i just realized my eta is.mostly just a long winded vent. Sorry for that but I needed to get it out.