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locking doors?

Posted by on Jul. 25, 2014 at 8:38 AM
  • 97 Replies
I realize this is mostly an SO problem but how do I approach it?

We have a rule...no locking doors. We don't lock bedroom doors. We don't lock bathroom doors. It's just our rule.

We have 1 bathroom for the whole family. We are moving but will continue to only have 1 bathroom.

Now that has been said, sd locks doors. Constantly. She knows the rule, she just doesn't care. It bothers me that she doesn't follow the rule and it's like the rules don't apply to her.

Nobody is allowed in her room so there is no need to lock the door. Her door is always closed.

Nobody has an interest in going in the bath room when she is in there, we are generally busy. But she will stay in there for 45+ minutes which is unreasonable in a 1 bath house.

I want to lay down the law before we get to the new house. I'm not asking her to give up privacy or not close the doors, simply stop locking them. There is no need to lock the door.

How do I get SO on the same page as far as she has to follow the house rules?
by on Jul. 25, 2014 at 8:38 AM
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Replies (1-10):
jupiter5
by Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 8:39 AM
3 moms liked this
Take the locks off. Obviously she likes privacy and I think she is right but if you want to make her listen take the locks.
mrswillie
by on Jul. 25, 2014 at 8:42 AM
Change the.knocks to ones without locks.
whatIknownow
by on Jul. 25, 2014 at 8:50 AM
1 mom liked this

Why not just let her lock the door? Is this a necessary rule? If she is sharing space with people, and she feels more comfortable locking her door, why not just let it go?

MBanks524
by Platinum Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 8:56 AM
2 moms liked this
I think the bathroom should be able to be locked but I'd take lock off bedroom
whatIknownow
by on Jul. 25, 2014 at 8:58 AM

I see you are calling this a "house rule" but, your boyfriend is not on the same page. So really this is your rule... that you want to become a house rule. You're trying to impose this rule on his children. Do you think that's going to help them accept you as a family member?

BrandiGra
by on Jul. 25, 2014 at 9:00 AM
Take the lock off. It take a screwdriver and 30 seconds.
My 11 year old lost privileges of have a bedroom door that locks because he was being reprimranded by me and locked me out of his room.
happymommy1105
by Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 9:08 AM
1 mom liked this
Considering he has punished my 8 year old for locking doors before and told him "we don't lock doors in this house" I would call that a house rule.

I'm beyond caring if sd likes, cares or accepts me.

All I'm asking is she follow the same rules as everybody else and if that makes me horrible, oh well.


Quoting whatIknownow:

I see you are calling this a "house rule" but, your boyfriend is not on the same page. So really this is your rule... that you want to become a house rule. You're trying to impose this rule on his children. Do you think that's going to help them accept you as a family member?

whatIknownow
by on Jul. 25, 2014 at 9:11 AM
3 moms liked this

why would you be beyond caring if your SD likes you or accepts you?

I don't see what the big deal is about locking doors. Everyone, especially non-family members who share a home, is entitled to a sense of security and privacy. Your SD is a non-family member and you have already stated that she's not your family and you don't even care if she considers you family. This is a dumb hill to die on. I think you are just trying to be the boss, you don't even care if your "rule" makes no sense.

Quoting happymommy1105: Considering he has punished my 8 year old for locking doors before and told him "we don't lock doors in this house" I would call that a house rule. I'm beyond caring if sd likes, cares or accepts me. All I'm asking is she follow the same rules as everybody else and if that makes me horrible, oh well.
Quoting whatIknownow:

I see you are calling this a "house rule" but, your boyfriend is not on the same page. So really this is your rule... that you want to become a house rule. You're trying to impose this rule on his children. Do you think that's going to help them accept you as a family member?


PeachQuean
by on Jul. 25, 2014 at 9:12 AM

I don't understand the no locking doors. Even my 6 yr old is allowed to lock doors here. 

But your house your rules...no advice I think its kinda weird. So here is a bump. 

XXanonymousXX
by Gold Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 9:19 AM
2 moms liked this
I think it's reasonable for SD to want to lock the door when she's in the bathroom. But I can understand you not wanting her locking herself in for 45 minutes in a one bathroom house.

And regardless of whether any of us think it's a good rule, it's a rule of your home thus it should be followed. I'm pretty sure parents all over the world enact much stricter/weirder rules and expect them to be followed. If you really don't want locked doors then I'd take off/disable the locks.
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