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2 questions....UPDATE

Posted by on Jul. 25, 2014 at 6:57 PM
  • 20 Replies
BM asked to keep child sun (his time) to take child to amusement park. He asked child if she wanted to go and she said no.

BM then got upset and said looks like child doesn't want to go to wedding. Looks like we both lose so u can get her Fri at 8am. (BM agreed a wk ago to let dad take child to wedding on her time end of Aug).

1. Should dad make daughter go with bm?

BM had child stay with dad during her week because she had to wrk was what she said. Child was suppose to go home last Fri but BM picked her up yesterday. He went to get child this morning for his time and BM said because he was late (15min) she will drop her off when they are done. It's been hrs later and dad txt bm when she's bringing child, and no answer. Dad thinks child might be at sitters because BMW probably at wrk and mad about sun. He thinks BM may keep her to take her sun.

2. We have plans tomorrow for kids and said if she doesn't come today he will go to sitters to see if child is there and if she is he will take her since BM would be at wrk if child is at sitters.....should he do that or call it a loss?.



UPDATE:
BM just dropped child off at dads. Looks like child wasn't even home this morning! She spent the nite at the sitters and has been there since wed when bm picked her up.BM didn't even spend time with her daughter!....but wants to play head games with dad...


by on Jul. 25, 2014 at 6:57 PM
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Replies (1-10):
faerie75
by Ruby Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 7:03 PM

 if it is his time he can go get her from the sitter. it prob wont go over well with mom but is it going over well that BM is playing around w his time? no.

both of them are not communicating well.

WickedPissah
by 2Sexy4MyStoma on Jul. 25, 2014 at 7:06 PM
4 moms liked this
Stop the tit for tat bullshit.
GlockMom
by Platinum Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 7:09 PM
If dad wants her for a wedding on her time he should send the child as requested on his time. He can't be an asshole and not be flexible and then think she is going to give him the extra time she told him he could have.
MBanks524
by Platinum Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 7:13 PM
They both need to be flexible. If she is willing to let you have the kid on her time you should be willing to give her child on yours.
pdxmum
by Ruby Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 7:15 PM
1 mom liked this

How old is the child?  I think it is poor form to ask a child if they want to go with the OP.  That was your DHs first mistake.  Did you have plans for Sunday or did he just want to screw with BM?  And what was he thinking after she just agreed to extra time.

And what kid would rather go to a wedding than an amusement park?

Time for DH to reset things with BM to keep the petty bullshit at bay.  Someone has to take the first step.

stepdiva
by Silver Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 7:24 PM
1 mom liked this
Yep, exactly.

Quoting pdxmum:

How old is the child?  I think it is poor form to ask a child if they want to go with the OP.  That was your DHs first mistake.  Did you have plans for Sunday or did he just want to screw with BM?  And what was he thinking after she just agreed to extra time.

And what kid would rather go to a wedding than an amusement park?

Time for DH to reset things with BM to keep the petty bullshit at bay.  Someone has to take the first step.

kpnthefaith
by Bronze Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 7:24 PM
So your saying make child go with BM eventhough she doesn't want to?

Dad never asked for more time this eleven. Dad told BM child had an appt tues(bms time) and would take her if she couldn't. At first she said no then changed her mind. Bm then told dad to keep child til Tue and BM would get her that evening and didn't show up til Thur. so dad didn't ask bm to give up her time.


Quoting GlockMom: If dad wants her for a wedding on her time he should send the child as requested on his time. He can't be an asshole and not be flexible and then think she is going to give him the extra time she told him he could have.
XXanonymousXX
by Gold Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 7:25 PM
1 mom liked this
If having SD returned to him on time is a hill to die on for him then yes he should get her from the sitter. But if he does that BM will likely fight even harder about the wedding.

This is why DH follows the CO so closely. When we got married we did it on a weekend he had SD per the CO. PITA to set up the party and keep a 6 year old entertained, but we didn't want to allow BM the control to f up the day. Follow the CO going forward and take BM's ability to tit for tat away.
kpnthefaith
by Bronze Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 7:29 PM
Child is 13. And doesn't have a good relationship with bm. Child said no also to going with BM to six flags earlier this month on bms time, so BM let her stay with dad.
Sundays we go to church so looks like child rather just be with dad than bm


Quoting pdxmum:

How old is the child?  I think it is poor form to ask a child if they want to go with the OP.  That was your DHs first mistake.  Did you have plans for Sunday or did he just want to screw with BM?  And what was he thinking after she just agreed to extra time.

And what kid would rather go to a wedding than an amusement park?

Time for DH to reset things with BM to keep the petty bullshit at bay.  Someone has to take the first step.

kpnthefaith
by Bronze Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 7:31 PM
That's the thing..this is dad's week per court order....

Quoting XXanonymousXX: If having SD returned to him on time is a hill to die on for him then yes he should get her from the sitter. But if he does that BM will likely fight even harder about the wedding.

This is why DH follows the CO so closely. When we got married we did it on a weekend he had SD per the CO. PITA to set up the party and keep a 6 year old entertained, but we didn't want to allow BM the control to f up the day. Follow the CO going forward and take BM's ability to tit for tat away.
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