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Would you PAY to see skids less?

Posted by on Aug. 13, 2014 at 3:11 AM
  • 128 Replies
I was just having a conversation that made me curious of your opinions!

Would you rather DH pay more child support in exchange for less visitation with the skids?

We all know being a SM is a thankless job. With all of the drama with BM, the endless fights with the kids at home and DH not doing his job as a parent, so it all falls on you, causing resentment against the kids and DH. And more.
by on Aug. 13, 2014 at 3:11 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Bubbles2014
by on Aug. 13, 2014 at 3:24 AM
Nah. The petty new drama with BM isn't worth it. And we can't afford it.
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MBanks524
by Silver Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 4:15 AM
No
chanizen
by Platinum Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 5:49 AM
4 moms liked this

Have been offered that option. Said no.

i don't know that I agree that being an sm is a thankless job.  And if dh wasn't doing his job as a parent, I would let him fail as a parent.  He is a big boy.  He wanted custody.  He needs to man up then.

GlockMom
by Platinum Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 7:03 AM
13 moms liked this
I didn't marry a shitty person. He parents, shielded me from as much of BM crap as possible and corrected any issues between me and the boys. Also, being SM shouldn't be thankless. Your husband should show his appreciation.

XXanonymousXX
by Bronze Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 7:23 AM
2 moms liked this
This option did come up with BM at one time. She didn't want to have SD equal amounts of time, and there was no CS as it was supposed to be 50/50 custody. DH explained to her that she had a responsibility for her kid of some combination of time and money. Less time equals more money. She didn't like that option and now sticks to 50/50.

I think it's a viable option that should be considered in situations we all read about where SM resents skids and BF is always working, not around much and isn't handling issues as they arise. Parents have a responsibility and if they can't fulfill one end they need to even it out on the other end, in whatever combination is in the best interest of the child.
WifeyC
by Platinum Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 7:23 AM
2 moms liked this

Such a weird question. When DH was NCP if he decided to see the kids less for any reason it would be a huge issue for me.  Probably a deal breaker.

leegirl_jm
by Ruby Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 7:58 AM
Our CS is calculated as if DH has no visitation and BM gives him very little visitation. I am good with whatever BM decides.

Now it seems DH pays to see him since he gets him for back to school shopping.
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Joie35
by Bronze Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:13 AM
Df pays the same amount of child support in the summer when he has the kids 24-7 as he does during the schoolyear when he only sees them every other major holiday. I personally think its bs because its like hes paying to support bm all summer long plus, supporting the kids here. She actually cuts her work hrs all summer to spend more time with her boyfriend while the kids are gone because her CS is almost enough for her to live on. Its ridiculous.
kss12
by Bronze Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:16 AM
I'd rather have ss more so we didn't have to pay each month, we could use that extra money
tiafez
by Silver Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:17 AM
4 moms liked this

none of OPs thankless job thing applies to me but I'll biteanyway. No, I would not pay more to see him less. I like him. He's an awesome kid/young adult and his parents (plural) did a great job with him!

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